Mount Olympus Annual Picnic

We have tidal waves here, Hera --- get off with your foreign-sounding disasters!

If you don't mind, though, can you leave off until after the Picnic... I mean - I do have some Personal and Business interests in the event now...and, may I add, I am a more than solid provider for the Eruvian Church at Needlehole - and my interests are (surely) protected by Eru Illuvatar Himself!!

Did you know, I sit up the front at Church, and am always impeccably dressed, a veritable Worthy of the Church - Respectable, you know - Respectable... {{{Not like those disselvelled souls down the back who sneakilly put their last pathetic pennies in the Offering Tray in the hope they'll be forgiven. }}}

Tauriel wrote:Hey can I come to this picnic?

Methinks me like you, Tauriel!
I heard you were quite arboreal,
roses, daphnes, asphidistras,
oh sexy greenie Earthern Mistress!

Oh now I sit and happy whittle -
My lips drip-a-drip all a'spittal -
Thinking of your curvy bow,
I think you're hot - I think you know!

I was gone for less than a WEEK and we're invaded by Greek and Norse Gods?????? What is the meaning of this!? Only I can be the most powerful, beautiful, best nosed, AWESOMEST being in forumshire! I AM THE QUEEN!!!!!!!!!!! I shall not be usurped!

Indeed Queen Tin, there are far too many oiks and weirdos here for my liking! Not to mention that hussy Tauriel. I had imagined our picnic to be like this:



But the way things are going, its going to end up like this:

Oi! are you callin me an oik loik?!!

well if the smelly clog fits!

and by the way my E-ZEE Wench agency is NOT disrespectable, i'll have you know I oil the eels of Crowned heads of Europe, and my girls are highly trained in Opposable Thumbage for the rich and famous hobbits of Bree!

ooooh hoity toity, I bet your friends in high places dont know I am yer cuz? and i'll wager they dont know where you lernt all yer high fallutin eel charmin ways? I'll tell Ma on you I will! that Mr Odo is nice and polite though, HE is a gennelman, always minds his P's and Q's, and the moon shines so sweet on that huge head of his.

girls girls tut tut gentlehobbits dont brawl in the streets like two plucked chickens, what will Zeus think? and him being the spitting image of my first hubby n'all hehe!

WHAT IS THIS RUMPOUS FROM OLYUMPUS?????

You all better check what you're drinking the day of the picnic

I shudder at the thought of what Eru Iluvatar will think when His Day Comes!

You all better check what you're drinking the day of the picnic- Tin

Rest assured your Maj I am staying right here, right next to your personnal store of 'rasberry juice'{{ }} to protect it from these rampagaing Gods and Goddesses. Already had to fish that little Loki feller out of a barrel. Completely ruined the taste forcing me to get rid of it all by consumption.

and for the ladies we will of course be having authentic Olympic Games, Orwell has got Petty in a manly headlock.

Really looking forward to this, already have my oufit ready

"Orwell has got Petty in a manly headlock."- Mrs Figg

Hey! I'll have you know that is a timehonoured Scotshobbit wrestling move known as 'the chewin aff aw his knackers'. Pretty has won medals at it.

So thats why Orwell talks in that high pitched squeak, I did tell him to use my all purpose eel oil and then nobody would have been able to get purchase on the family jools.

Well in a proper Scots wrestling match the participants should be oiled up in proper manly fashion of course. Thats why its such a tricky manouevre to pull off. Pretty's skill at it is uncanny.

Ooy!

Rules and safetly is very important to the ancient Greeks. See how the man with the stick is checking to make sure the jools are properly oiled?

What happened to the picnic?
Is everyone scared off?
Are you a pack of wusses?
Or just a stack of Toffs?

Indeed only 3 days to go! Does it open on the Friday or the Saturday Mrs Figg? Is there an opning ceremony? Entertainment ready to go? Oooooh, excitment and buckie anticipation builds!!

I think I'm working then --- or sleeping ---

you had better not be sleeping Orwell.

erm I dont know Petty, I bow to your greater influence over the gods, as I know you supply them with buckie from the back of a white van.
erm opening ceremony yeeps! maybe a flaming torch or something fitting?

Now would you look at that! Little Loki is an old style Aisha! Awwww...

Not to worry Mrs Figg- the NotP feared such a thing might happen and has a contingency plan for the opening. Although admitedly I've had to modify it a bit- yoou'd think they would understand a Hobbit Lass of the Day does not count as a torch holder! Pretty has the Lasses Union up in arms. (But I suspect only because if anyone is to be used that way publicly at a mass media event she wants it to be her )

Ooh I'm a cute little pussy,
With a very licky tongue,
I'll do a lot of licking,
When the picnic is begun!