Critics review 'Desolation of Smaug' | POSSIBLE SPOILERS

Mrs Figg wrote:

Elthir wrote:Where is Bree?

Turn left after the Barrow Downs, follow the Road for a mile or so, skip past dodgy looking fellows in black cloaks and Bree is up ahead. Avoid Hobbits with jewelry.   

Isn't that turn right?   

Wouldn't turning left just lead you back to the Shire.

I was facing the other way.

Ah, thats the mistake I made.  

I just ended up back in Forumshire.   

bungobaggins wrote:

Mrs Figg wrote:wow those people who run TORn are very defensive. Theres this gushing vomit inducing staff review, and at the end people get to post an opinion. Even the slightest, mildest criticizm gets immediately jumped on, literally theres a staffer telling the poor poster to shut up and stop moaning for daring to state the obvious ie this is not the Hobbit, and then the yappers all pile in to ward off the interloper.    pathetic.

ELE! ELE!

  

Mrs Figg wrote:

Elthir wrote:Where is Bree?

Turn left after the Barrow Downs, follow the Road for a mile or so, skip past dodgy looking fellows in black cloaks and Bree is up ahead. Avoid Hobbits with jewelry.   

And kick the bearded guy eating the carrot in the junk on the way in, there's a sport.

Radaghast wrote:

Mrs Figg wrote:

Elthir wrote:Where is Bree?

.......And kick the bearded guy eating the carrot in the junk on the way in, there's a sport.

I like the flavor of figgs thoughts tonight even more than I usually do...

Music of the Ainur wrote:

Radaghast wrote:

Mrs Figg wrote:

Elthir wrote:Where is Bree?

.......And kick the bearded guy eating the carrot in the junk on the way in, there's a sport.

I like the flavor of figgs thoughts tonight even more than I usually do...

the only thing sharper than a razor blade is Figgs tongue, and it gets worse when you make her mad    Just ask petty they have had many "spirited" dicussions     

I think that's Raddy's quote being misquoted.

 

Elthir wrote:

Eldorion wrote:Interestingly, I glanced around at his other articles and he actually really disliked DOS.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/seth-abramson/the-top-5-most-prepostero_b_4446500.html

From the above Article: "Tolkien had done sufficient work on the millennia-long history of Middle Earth that the central place of The Hobbit in the longer narrative of the One Ring had become eminently clear. (Indeed, Tolkien had written an appendix-like short story, "The Quest of Erebor," to tell the tale of The Hobbit in a literary style more alive to its relation to, and its interconnection with, the more conspicuously-majestic events of The Lord of the Rings.) It is upon this larger narrative that Jackson has undoubtedly been focused for the fifteen years he's been working on bringing Tolkien's literary vision to the silver screen. (Just 51, Jackson has now spent nearly a third of his life on the project.) Jackson's knowledge of Tolkien lore can be presumed to exceed that of any small-city film critic by a factor of twenty or more, and way he shot The Hobbit reveals it unambiguously."

WTF? Did this guy take a bribe or something? Did even bother to read these Appendices that Jackson keeps using as a Bull sh&(*&))(^%$&^ shield to fool the masses?  This critic couldn't be expected to use his own brain and actually read what Jackson is claiming to be the source of his crapola.... Unbelievable.   

But then again I now I think I understand, yes I see, Jackson is the supreme lover of Tolkien and after all he did "focus" for fifteen long years on this so, yes I suppose he is the expert after all, and yes now I see.... I love Peter Jackson and I think his work is brilliant and completely true to the originals, and Wow, so very excellent. He is the greatest film maker in history.   
                        

geeze I read further and see that he did read it, my bad. However I don't see how he can defend Pj as to what he did with that source material...

Eldorion wrote: Assuming this isn't an elaborate linguistic joke... http://the-hobbit-movie.com/forum/

Thanks Eldo. I guess I haven't been paying enough attention, or forgot, as when I asked I thought 'Bree' was different from this site.

I actually posted there a few times, but my logging in troubles in Bree have not helped my interest.

bungobaggins wrote:I think that's Raddy's quote being misquoted.

I know.    

(((((I wouldnt have kicked PJ, I would have stuck the carrot somewhere moist.  ))))

Elthir wrote:Thanks Eldo. I guess I haven't been paying enough attention, or forgot, as when I asked I thought 'Bree' was different from this site.

I actually posted there a few times, but my logging in troubles in Bree have not helped my interest.

No problem, Elthir. This forum used to be hosted on that site, but after we went our separate ways someone (I think Odo) started calling it the Bree to our Shire and the name stuck.

I've had trouble logging in there too. I think I just made a new account under the same name, but I don't post there much.

Mrs Figg wrote:

bungobaggins wrote:I think that's Raddy's quote being misquoted.

I know.    

(((((I wouldnt have kicked PJ, I would have stuck the carrot somewhere moist.  ))))

Like his jugular?

If your going to attack someone, you wait till they come OUT of the Inn, THEN you do them in, not act all sinister INSIDE the place where there's witnesses. And I thought Beorn "changed" at night ? not when it pleased him. And he must be magic or else he's borrowed those shackles from the incredible hulk ? as they do seem to alter size. And why all these references to "The Master" (ring fiddle, ring fiddle, black throaty speech) I couldnt give a fook about Beorn by the depiction PJ gave us, yet in the book I had a respect for him. Bilbo up at the top of the tree ? ooh not far away now ! he says, not fooking likely mate ! its bloody miles away to the Mountain ! PJ made Bilbo seem to dependent on the Ring to soon I think.Going by this then Bilbo should have been a dribbling crazy lunatic,foaming at the mouth & tied up in a nut house by the time LOTRs came out. I thought Legolas was to "Rambo", in LOTRs he came across quiet, laid back, almost virginal yet here he was leader of a gang of street yobs, I thought Tauriel was to Anime in the fights & What gave Legolas the feeling to be jealous so quick when Kili spoke to Tauriel. Thandy's scar was pinched from "Batman" (& 2face wants it back !) It seemed that the Dwarves were only in Thandy's Kingdom for a couple of hours & already Bilbo knew his way round & could guide the Dwarves out & he was so convinced his idea was the only & best one. The Spiders sequence I actually liked, it was creepy but the "He Man" stabbing of the "bug" was unnecessary really. Mirkwood was ok when we got to spiders but it all felt a smaller wood to me than I felt it to be in the book, & we didnt have the occasional glimpse of Beorn looking out for his ponies etc.   Going back to "barrels", We didnt see the lead up to the Elves being so hammered they couldnt hear half a dozen wooden barrels crashing down to the river. River went to fast, it was nearly a white water Rapid ride, there were to many rocks to navigate round, so assuming the barrels are released unattended,they probably lose half as half would surely smash on a rock ? And now we have an Orc parade to watch the Dwarves go by, Kili has a "Boromir" moment, Leggy & Tauriel between them kill so many Orcs why bother to have an Elf army. In fact, the lack of Elfy friends at that moment suggest they were all sipping homebrew back with Thandypants. Dwalin going down the river at that speed wouldnt be able to have hewed that log so successfully ! Then weapon throwing between Dwarves ? & no one misses or drops anything. Oh & lets play domino's ! barrels are great for that. Legolas doing the two step on Dwarves heads ? You know, if Tauriel gets bumped off in next film it would have great to have had her & Leggy at Helms Deep in TTT's, would save on Elf costumes. Pedigree Pugs in Laketown ? Are they on the pay role ? can they get tax exemption ?  Do they have a bank account ? There was SO much wrong with this film, so much ! I can feel the tears behind my eyes trying to come out but, Im in to much shock I think. This will hit me later on & IL be screaming into my cornflakes ! Oh & speaking of cornflakes... so are you PJ, a fooking flake ! There honestly isnt one thing I could say I liked.....Im thinking   ...no......nothings coming......

  very crabbit Azriel. good point about Bilbo saying the mountain was near, it looked at least 100 miles away to me as well  

Oh, Ive only just started Figgy old bean !   

I can only say I feel your pain, Azriel

I can't argue with a word you said Azriel. But since the only category I'm even entered in is Most Liberal, I've got to try to be positive, right?

I liked the feel of Beorn's house, the cows, goats, bees and such, and the straw on the floor. I could almost smell it.  I'd like to imagine the animals could have spoken if they'd wanted, but they either had nothing to say or were too well raised to go rambling on to strangers.  

And the ponies were 100 times better than in AUJ.

There! That's all the positivity I can muster for the moment.

Great to hear your view on it Azriel. It certainly lived up to expectations I see.

So is it just me and Rhadagast who hasn't seen it now?

And I could have seen it on the 10th... Getting a little bit embarrassing.  

Hey ho tiddly oh, lets skip up the grassy slope to the suddenly night time,cold wet stone mountain, Gandy gets all wise & serious, drawing his sword, like THATS gonna do anything to a swirling settee fire smoke cloud, He wouldnt have been able to stop after sliding down that shaft, (sorry ! shaft...thats YOU pJ) unless he had his mithril body wire. More eerie speech (oooooh watch out kids,sleep with one eye open!) about Sauron, war, death & all, *yawn*, & where did Raddy pop up from ? a trap door in the floor ? Bolg looks like a rubber "Archer" from "Small Soldiers". And whats with the secret coding at Laketown ,nudge nudge wink wank,(thats you again PJ) between the locals & Bard ? Why is he treated like a Uriah ? & toilets ! Is this "Johnny fooking English" now ?! And why does Balin have to do all the stirring heroic speeches on behalf of Thorin ? its so our premenstrual hero can have his moment of glory in the sun ! Jutted jaw, hypnotic gaze into....3rd camera left shot. Ofcourse this diminutive throwback is obviously such a novelty that after only a few words the whole of bloody Laketown are cheering for him ! "You've got keen eyes" says Thorin to Bilboas they look for a stair case to the "magic door",oooooh ! yeah, well, if you hadnt kept staring at your own magnificent reflection so much youde have seen it to,big head !

No. Orwell, Chris and Lance havent seen it yet either. Amarie may have seen it but she hasnt said.   

Orwell and Chris have to wait until the 26th to even have a chance of seeing it. I don't know what Lance's excuse is.

Oh, and Raddy is boycotting the film.

AMARIE????? have you seen it????