Petty's Purist LotR Edits [3]

I sympathise Meiko- I am weekly having to kick the wolf from the door too.  
(And I just got a nasty letter threatening to cut off the little I do get for failing to attend an appointment that they cancelled!   )

I am still working on re-uploading book 4- I will get to that today hopefully, but for right now its not available, but the rest are.
I hope you enjoy them and I look forward to hearing your thoughts.

Seems to be a Christmas tradition eh, Petty? I'm right out of a job and up to my keen elven eyes in bills/debts/nasty things that come in the post (perhaps I should just get rid of the mailbox and solve nearly all my problems?), so looking to buy up some camping gear with the last of my cash (the Aragorn route, I always wanted to be Aragorn) and live in the bush. "Once a jolly swagman..." *hums* Hope you've got a good wizard's staff to hand to set those wargs on fire!

Hopefully my internet doesn't get cut off before I get to download it all. I'm surprised it hasn't been cut of as yet, or the phone. I've been looking forward to this for so long! Couple more hours and I'll be watching Book 1, downloading Part 11 now :-)

I hope you get it all in time- if you dont you can always email or pm me here and if you have large enough mem stick I can post them to you same as I did for Dave.

Crossing fingers! End of next week my address is likely to be:

Under the Bluegum,
100m north of that big rock
Whatchamacallit Creek
Back of Ballarat


Still, I've decided I can at least live out my Aragorn fantasy (although killing rabbits and ducks isn't quite as heroic as killing orcs...), and become a philosopher. I'll be taking my recorder, some cheap notebooks and enough pens to last me some time, so I can do some writing. Might be the most productive and profound years of my life!

 

I like your attitude Meiko!
But if you do find yourself doing an Aragorn I do hope you can have at least one mobile device that will let you visit us here, you can keep us up to date on the rabbit slaying!  

Sorry to hear about your situation, Meiko, and yours also, Petty. We've never had it that bad, but after I "grew up" I've looked back at certain periods of my upbringing where I can remember my mother really struggling to put food on the table for us kids and pay the bills, though I didn't know or understand it at the time. More than once I've felt like an ass when I remember how much I got for Christmas, how much it must have cost her. I hope you guys do all right and that life isn't too hard on you. Let's hope a jumbuck stops by your billabong for Christmas, Meiko

MeikoElektra wrote:Crossing fingers! End of next week my address is likely to be:

Under the Bluegum,
100m north of that big rock
Whatchamacallit Creek
Back of Ballarat


Still, I've decided I can at least live out my Aragorn fantasy (although killing rabbits and ducks isn't quite as heroic as killing orcs...), and become a philosopher. I'll be taking my recorder, some cheap notebooks and enough pens to last me some time, so I can do some writing. Might be the most productive and profound years of my life!

 

Sounds like an adventure! If you ever publish your writings, let us know

Meiko if I had loads of cash I would send it to you in a heartbeat. I know what it feels like to be homeless and without a job, its the crappest thing ever. Hang in there, you seem to have a strong spirit, I wish you well whatever happens.

Ringdrotten wrote:Sorry to hear about your situation, Meiko, and yours also, Petty.

+ 1. Best wishes, guys.

I'll not have electricity or a mobile device but will have cash so will pop into an internet cafe (if they indeed exist in the little country towns of Victoria) and say hello. Then move quickly on before the wargs/creditors can hunt me down.

Thanks Mrs Figg and Radaghast. Figgy, it's somewhat comforting to know that others have been in this situation and survived, although it sucks that you had to experience it! It frustrates me that it's entirely a result of my soft heart and bad judgement! But live and learn, I guess, and make the best of a bad situation!

Ringdrotten, it would be a crime not to publish...unless my writing is so poor it would be a crime to publish! But hey, Stephenie Meyer got away with it and she can't even spell her first name, let alone write a half-decent vampire pulp romance.

Ringdrotten wrote:Sorry to hear about your situation, Meiko, and yours also, Petty. We've never had it that bad, but after I "grew up" I've looked back at certain periods of my upbringing where I can remember my mother really struggling to put food on the table for us kids and pay the bills, though I didn't know or understand it at the time. More than once I've felt like an ass when I remember how much I got for Christmas, how much it must have cost her. I hope you guys do all right and that life isn't too hard on you. Let's hope a jumbuck stops by your billabong for Christmas, Meiko

A jumbuck for Christmas would be excellent! So long as the troopers don't turn up hehe. I'm planning on eating roadkill til I get decent with a bow. Good incentive to practice  Thankfully longbows are without licencing requirements (crossbows are a different story) as my mental health issues mean I can't get a firearms licence anymore. And you don't need a hunting licence to hunt any feral animals except deer - which is a pity, I've always wanted to taste venison, but at least I don't have to cart the damn thing back to camp or pull a 22kg load on the bow! And there are some native duck species that are freely available for hunting too. I'm getting hungry just at the thought!  

MeikoElektra wrote:And you don't need a hunting licence to hunt any feral animals except deer - which is a pity, I've always wanted to taste venison, but at least I don't have to cart the damn thing back to camp or pull a 22kg load on the bow!

Wow, they won't let you hunt a species that's not native to the country without a license? (You're in Australia, right?)

Hi Meiko!
Good luck with the new adventure. Please do check in when you can. I'm looking forward to hearing what you think of the edits.

As for the bills, I once had a friend in a similar situation who invested in an official looking rubber stamp that simply said "Undeliverable: Presumed Lost at Sea". All bills got stamped and returned to the sender. He said it was the best investment he ever made!  

Petty - I know, ridiculous, huh? I think the main purpose of the licence however is to make sure it's a clean kill. Heart/lung shot for a deer, and with a bow you need to have a fair bit of power behind it. Bow-hunting a deer, you need (by law) to be pulling 22kg on the bow, which is more than half my weight. I can lift and carry 25 kg, maximum strength 50 kg, but to hold and aim 22 would be a fairly taxing exercise. It's roo I'm bummed about, I love the taste and they're plentiful enough that they hang around our suburb being a nuisance in the park, but I'll have to wait til I find a fresh carcass on the roadside to get some of that. I'm not shy about eating whatever I can safely and legally lay my hands on!

David< that stamp is BRILLIANT! Oh if only I could find one! Lost at sea...that'd be nice, I could stow away or join a bunch of pirates. Yo ho ho! Although grog and dry biscuits are less appetizing than (boiled) spring water and roasted crickets (which is probably all I'll be able to catch for the first few months  )

ETA: Book 1, part 17 of 17 halfway done! Yippee!  

I dont like the thought of you living in a tent Meiko, although you may know about hunting and stuff. Have you been to contact the social services, if they are like English ones you can get Emergency accommodation and help if you are in difficulty. I was 18 when it happened to me, I ran away from home, lived in a squat and went from friends flat to friends sofa for ages. I didnt even understand I was homeless, it seemed normal, but I was seriously messed up emotionally, I wandered around and lived on baked beans on toast and tea. I had to sell all my stuff to survive, then I went to the social and they got me a flat, it was horrible but it was mine, luckily I got some benefits as well. Then I decided to go to Uni for the first time, and that got my self confidence back.

Would have to pay for emergency accommodation (ridiculous, isn't it?), besides it's in very high demand and they have to move you on, only there are no public housing places and it will be many years before I can afford to rent privately with the amount of debt I've accumulated. Have no friends with sofas, and there are no squats to be had anymore here, property is too precious - my parents lived in squats for years and we used to do up places, so if there were it'd be easy as. I'm good at the no food stuff, have starved many times before while helping others out (lived on one meal a week for a few months, with the occasional little tin of tuna as a midweek treat). At least in the bush I won't be moved on by cops, have slept in the park a few times but some well-meaning person always rings them. The toughest things are keeping the wind out, and keeping dry. A tarp, ground tarp and thermal-rated sleeping bag will cover that off. Other than that, boil the water, eat whatever is edible (and I'm pretty game) and stay away from people to avoid getting arrested, robbed or worse. All in all, it'll cost about $500 to live in relative comfort for 2 years - pretty good considering!

So glad to hear you got back on your feet! Gives me hope that maybe one day I might find myself out of this mess a.k.a. the Emyn Muil!

"The toughest things are keeping the wind out, and keeping dry. A tarp, ground tarp and thermal-rated sleeping bag will cover that off. Other than that, boil the water, eat whatever is edible (and I'm pretty game) and stay away from people to avoid getting arrested, robbed or worse. All in all, it'll cost about $500 to live in relative comfort for 2 years - pretty good considering!"

Just make sure you've always got one full set of dry clothes in your backpack, and keep it in plastic bags. When you sleep, put your underwear on your belly, or spread it out under your armpits (may sound strange, but it'll dry them in a matter of hours) If it rains, but on your wet clothes if you're going to go outside your tarp, those dry clothes are gold. Bring an extra pair of woolen socks too, if you have. I don't know how cold it gets down there, but warm feet should not be underestimated I'm guessing you know all of this stuff, though, since you are planning on going through with this, but thought I'd mention it all the same.

Also, if it snows down there in winter (shows how much I know about your country ), a good trick is to wear two layers of socks, and between the two layers you wrap plastic bags around your feet. Your feet will sweat a lot, but as long as you air them every six hours or so the smell will be the only thing bothering you. The point of it is to keep the sweat away from your boots so they don't freeze during the night. Waking up to frozen boots is about the shittiest morning sight there is in winter

Also, you must publish this, regardless of how it turns out - it'll be like Bear Grylls on speed

OK, now onto FAR more serious stuff than life! Petty's Purist Edits, Book 1 Review!

Prologue - I reckon you could do away with even what you have here (the Ring verse) and include that imagery when Gandalf is reciting it to Frodo during the fire scene. Many films start off very innocent/cheerful then gradually put in the darkness, I like the effect of not having all the backstory as it mirrors the effect in the book where the Shadow kind of creeps into the story. Prologues are very much a modern fantasy thing, and something that should probably be done away with in writing, and I think this is mostly due to the film industry - where I think prologues are mostly unnecessary too.

An Unexpected Party - Love it, a few minor cuts and I agree with them all. Do appreciate the toning down of the dragon firework sequence - makes the hobbits look more like innocent rustics than complete crazies, and I don't think we need a "shock" moment that early in the film. Also not introducing M & P now means the 17 years thing can happen, and they look less foolish.

The Shadow of the Past - this benefits greatly from the lack of Prologue. I would probably make the flashbacks more "glimpse-like" and each flashback scene briefer, although this may seem to go faster if there was narration. Other than that, perfect.

Three is Company/A Shortcut to Mushrooms/A Conspiracy Unmasked/The Old Forest/In the House of Tom Bombadil/Fog on the Barrowdowns - no fault of yours, Petty, just wish M & P could have been introduced as they were in the book. Not saying you have to have Maggot or Crickhollow or Old Forest or the Barrowdowns in - I think these are all necessary cuts for a film as it takes a very long time to get to Rivendell as it is. I would love them in a "fan extended edition". The attack on Crickhollow is terrifying, while the Barrowdowns sequence is downright creepy and it'd be an awesome way for them to find their swords, but in a theatrical cut they don't work IMO. Greatly miss Sam's tale of the visit of the Black Rider to the Gaffer. Really started the chills, that. Could do without the chase to the Ferry, as I found the "bundle" that moved on the jetty waaaay more frightening in the book. And that call/signal wail. Eep! *shivers*  I'm not much of a fan of unnecessary chase scenes. Like that Gandalf is MIA, think this can be told later and still give Christopher Lee plenty of screen time.

At the Inn of the Prancing Pony/Strider - Can I just say that, if PJ got nothing else right (which I don't really agree with, there IS plenty I like), that Aragorn-pipe-glow image is PERFECT. Right out of my head! No notable edits here. No ring falling on finger but that doesn't bother me either way, no Butterbur closing his eyes as Black Riders enter, once again doesn't bother me either way. Really miss the letter sequence here, along with Merry experiencing the Black Breath, but can't have everything and this needs to go more quickly than the book, given how much time is spent building up. Would be different if you make six films instead of three however, with a relatively un-cut version of Book One, you could have one VERY spooky film on your hands - downright terrifying!

A Knife in the Dark - no real comment on the edits here. Just major frustration (as usual) as Frodo just falls over and drops his dagger rather than fighting back and shouting "Elbereth Gilthoniel!" One of many lost character-building moments for Frodo in Jackson's films.

Flight to the Ford - amazing how the simple removal of Arwen saying the words to make the river flood changes things (plus the cutting of that awful "if you want him, come and claim him!"). She is sitting there with a sword but you get much more of a feeling that it's a last line defence, and it suddenly seems far more appropriate for the daughter of Elrond - you'd expect her to pull out a slender blade at the last moment when all hope is lost, just not sit there verbally challenging the wraiths and posturing with a sword. Makes me feel entirely fine with it being Arwen that arrives to help rather than Glorfindel. The only thing that actually annoys me is that Frodo isn't on that horse by himself, defying the riders (lost character-building moment #2 - rather terrible given he's supposed to be the main character).

More general notes:

- I have never seen LotR in HD before. Some of the effects are very noticeable e.g. greenscreen sharp edges on the cart when Frodo is going to Bag-End with Gandalf. Also the underwater sequence with Deagol. Will be interesting to see how other stuff looks. Gollum looks fine at the moment, from the little we see. I noticed a few things that I hadn't before, particularly the interesting assortment of horses and ponies in the field just inside the walls of Bree.

- The darkening and reddening of the Mordor scenes I'm quite happy with, although it can sometimes be a little more difficult to see what's happening, particularly if it were a first time viewing.

- Viggo Mortensen is even better in HD, and I could catch more subtle expressions of his.

- Ian Holm and Ian Mackellan are bloody BRILLIANT actors. That whole sequence at Bag-End just stands out SO MUCH, even though I've seen it a hundred times. Viggo is fantastic too - I sit somewhere between Figgy and Petty on the rethinking of Aragorn's inner turmoil, but Viggo is amazing too (as is Christopher Lee).

- Which brings me to Frodo. The film does Frodo's character no favours, nearly all his brave moments are removed, he is allowed to show no courage. This frustrates me enormously. Add into the that the American inflection in his voice which he doesn't really successfully hide (especially when he raises his voice) and the lack of "stout hobbit-ness" about him and I just can't be happy. Also some brown eyes would be nice in a hobbit. But that's not Petty's fault!

So there we are - comments for Book 1!

Thanks Meiko- so much I wish I could fix but cant (Incidentally Bakshi gets both the song at Bree, Merry going for a walk and being confronted by the Black Riders and Butterbur and Aragorns confrontation in a film thats even more compacted than PJ's- for me PJ wastes too much time on trivia like a hobbit being amazed at the existence of a pint of beer   )

The ring verse, I am not sure where ele it could go, as Gandalf in PJ's never actually says it (Which is why its actually Sir Michael Horden in the BBC radio version I used).

And yes no matter how you cut these films Frodo is still a travesty- but he is not quite as bad as Pj's especially in the later edits where PJ's more erroneous mistakes are dealt with.

Hope you enjoy the next one too.

MeikoElektra wrote:- Which brings me to Frodo. The film does Frodo's character no favours, nearly all his brave moments are removed, he is allowed to show no courage. This frustrates me enormously. Add into the that the American inflection in his voice which he doesn't really successfully hide (especially when he raises his voice) and the lack of "stout hobbit-ness" about him and I just can't be happy. Also some brown eyes would be nice in a hobbit. But that's not Petty's fault!

Yeah, this is a sore spot for me, too, perhaps the sorest. It's one thing to cast the part of the oldest of the four hobbits with one so young, but then to strip his character of everything significant is just too much to overlook—and then to have Frodo solve the Moria gate riddle instead of Gandalf seems a pretty lame and meaningless attempt to make it up.

Pettytyrant101 wrote:Thanks Meiko- so much I wish I could fix but cant (Incidentally Bakshi gets both the song at Bree, Merry going for a walk and being confronted by the Black Riders and Butterbur and Aragorns confrontation in a film thats even more compacted than PJ's- for me PJ wastes too much time on trivia like a hobbit being amazed at the existence of a pint of beer   )

Too true  

Ringdrotten wrote:
Just make sure you've always got one full set of dry clothes in your backpack, and keep it in plastic bags. When you sleep, put your underwear on your belly, or spread it out under your armpits (may sound strange, but it'll dry them in a matter of hours) :)If it rains, but on your wet clothes if you're going to go outside your tarp, those dry clothes are gold. Bring an extra pair of woolen socks too, if you have. I don't know how cold it gets down there, but warm feet should not be underestimated :)I'm guessing you know all of this stuff, though, since you are planning on going through with this, but thought I'd mention it all the same.

Also, if it snows down there in winter (shows how much I know about your country ), a good trick is to wear two layers of socks, and between the two layers you wrap plastic bags around your feet. Your feet will sweat a lot, but as long as you air them every six hours or so the smell will be the only thing bothering you. The point of it is to keep the sweat away from your boots so they don't freeze during the night. Waking up to frozen boots is about the shittiest morning sight there is in winter

Thanks Ringdrotten for what is clearly advice from a seasoned camper! I've got two sets of clothes and lots of plastic bags (plus ziplock bags for the essential non-wettables), but I never thought to dry them in the method you mentioned! It will get down to (at the worst) -10C, but probably more like -5 unless I'm in the Victorian Alps over winter. I may see a little snow but my greatest danger is bushfire over summer (plus heatstroke, am NOT planning to move by day!) - this will mean not being able to boil water or cook food so will have to buy a SteriPEN and hand-charger for the water, and stick to insects and plant matter in terms of food.

Pettytyrant101 wrote:Thanks Meiko- so much I wish I could fix but cant (Incidentally Bakshi gets both the song at Bree, Merry going for a walk and being confronted by the Black Riders and Butterbur and Aragorns confrontation in a film thats even more compacted than PJ's- for me PJ wastes too much time on trivia like a hobbit being amazed at the existence of a pint of beer   )

I know The song and the events that follow would also give more of a "We're not in Kansas anymore" feel. Going from hobbit merriment to Bill Ferny and his mate slinking out/threat of danger.

The ring verse, I am not sure where ele it could go, as Gandalf in PJ's never actually says it (Which is why its actually Sir Michael Horden in the BBC radio version I used).

I noticed Michael Horden's voice! Was thinking basically do the same, get Gandalf to say the ring verse straight after saying "The language is that of Mordor, which I will not utter here" - then follow up with the Great Rings images with v/o by Horden saying "In the common tongue it reads, [ring verse]". Do you think this would work?

And yes no matter how you cut these films Frodo is still a travesty- but he is not quite as bad as Pj's especially in the later edits where PJ's more erroneous mistakes are dealt with.

Yep, can't make new material can you! Will be particularly interested to see Frodo-related changes in future parts!

Hope you enjoy the next one too.

I'm sure I will!

Meiko, Ive just read your "story" & Im choked ! How could anyone in this century be forced to survive a life like this ?! Its beyond belief ! Its purely medieval, My heart tugs for you ! I wish you all the strength youll need to get through this, I wish you hope & lots of good luck for a better, brighter future !! This is fooking shit ! NO-ONE should live like this ! You need help & you should be getting it! I hope you'll be alright ?! I dont even know you & Im bloody worried !