what sort of jokes can I get away with?

briliant.

A teddy bear is working on a building site. He goes for a tea break and when he returns he notices his pick has been stolen. The bear is angry and reports the theft to the foreman. The foreman grins at the bear and says "Oh, I forgot to tell you, today's the day the teddy bears have their pick nicked."

A wife stripped naked in front of her husband and asked him what he was more attracted to her beautiful face or sexy body.

he laughed and replied your sence of humor

One day there where two boy's playing by a stream. One of the boys went over to a bush and the other couldn't figure out why he had been there for so long. The other boy went over in the bush to look. The two boy's where watching a nakend women in the stream.

All of a sudden the second boy took off running. The first not understanding took of after him. When he finnaly caught up to the second boy he asked why he ran away.

The second boy replied "My mom told me if i ever saw a naked lady i would turn to stone, and I felt something getting hard so i ran."

hi

Wazzup?

gag me

A farmer recieved new milking equipment but instead of attaching it to the cows he placed it on himself, after having the most fantasic orgasms imagine his horror when he read the label...... "will only disconnect after filling with 2 litres" !!

6 months.

6 months ??

azriel wrote:A farmer recieved new milking equipment but instead of attaching it to the cows he placed it on himself, after having the most fantasic orgasms imagine his horror when he read the label...... "will only disconnect after filling with 2 litres" !!

CC12 35 wrote:gag me

pleasure.

azriel wrote:6 months ??

I worked it out. Do you really need the details?

oops ! just did !
theres me thinking Ive been ANNOYING you for 6 months !

Hmm...not sure all women have the information to work that out for themselves. Congratulations for paying attention during the ....er....wilder parts of your life.

Hee Hee

Guy asks his wife;
"Darling what would you do if I won the lotto?"
Wife says;
"Well i would take half and leave your ass"
Husband replies;
"Really !! Oh great cos i got 3 numbers and won £10, so here's £5 now fuck off"

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman were sitting in a bar, drinking and discussing how stupid their wives were.
The Englishman says, "I tell you, my wife is so stupid. Last week she went to the supermarket and bought $300 worth of meat because it was on sale, and we don't even have a freezer to keep it in."
The Scotsman agrees that she sounds pretty thick, but says his wife is thicker. "Just last week, she went out and spent $17,000 on a new car," he laments, "and she doesn't even know how to drive!"
The Irishman nods sagely, and agrees that these two woman sound like they both fell out of the stupid tree and got hit by every branch. However, he still thinks his wife is dumber. "Ah, it kills me every toime oi tink of it," he chuckles. "Moy woife just left to go on a holiday in Greece. Oy watched her packing her bag, and she must have put about 100 condoms in there. And she doesn't even have a penis!"