Re: The Bigger, Badder, Even More Serious Thread [2]

[Amarië]

It's not believing in God or gods or deities or lucky gym shorts that is the problem, it's the people who take advantage of peoples beliefs and abuse the power they have been given (or taken) as rulers and guides and authority figures. I have seen the strength and comfort faith can give to good people, I envy them a bit. Perhaps it is just a placebo effect, it may not work for you but it may on others. Religion is a tool, it's all about how you use it.

And there's a reason why Arabs traditionally don't shake hands. The right hand, which we use to shake hands with, is dirty. In the desert you just don't have the luxury to be wasting water. So they would eat with their left hand and wipe their rear with the right hand.

[Amarië]

(...) By sunrise we were showing Athens our fannies.
(...)

Now was that really the best choice of words to end the story with?

[Orwell]

Men are stripped of power in one of the most important aspects of manhood- instead of picking a women to provide our children we are left trying to attract one.

This idea of women attracting the right kind of male to suit them is perfectly good Evolutionary Theory. As humans become more 'thoughtful' about things, and less purely attracted as 'animals' wanting just to procreate, then the Race will continue to progress - over a long period of time, just like Democracy. (One day Religion will die a natural - and necessary - death).

{{{Now, Petty, the brainless will stay brainless and continue to breed more brainless people, true, but the intelligent will rule the world with Kindness - and a Firm hand where necessary! As time goes by, more and more intelligent people will be born. At some stage, the 'most' intelligent will build a Carrot-Ark and set off into space to form a "Culture Unparallelled New and Tasteful" (perhaps on Mars) where stupid people will be banned. If by some mischance, a couple breed an stupid child, it will be exiled back to Earth. I have it all worked out, you see. Don't tell the others -- they're too thick to understand a programme like this at all, at all. }}}

[Orwell]

It's not believing in God or gods or deities or lucky gym shorts that is the problem, it's the people who take advantage of peoples beliefs and abuse the power they have been given (or taken) as rulers and guides and authority figures. I have seen the strength and comfort faith can give to good people, I envy them a bit. Perhaps it is just a placebo effect, it may not work for you but it may on others. Religion is a tool, it's all about how you use it.

Religion = Patriarchy = the Power to Delude Others and so Rule Them (and Keep Women in their Place).

And there's a reason why Arabs traditionally don't shake hands. The right hand, which we use to shake hands with, is dirty. In the desert you just don't have the luxury to be wasting water. So they would eat with their left hand and wipe their rear with the right hand.

Religion, metaphysically speaking, is the act of wiping one's arse with one's hand - i.e. an unecessary practice. An intelligent person, knowing about personal hygiene, would use toilet paper. Religion = Uncivilized Thinking, you see.

[halfwise]

And there's a reason why Arabs traditionally don't shake hands. The right hand, which we use to shake hands with, is dirty. In the desert you just don't have the luxury to be wasting water. So they would eat with their left hand and wipe their rear with the right hand.

Umm...in my experience most cultures wipe with their left and eat with their right. Are you sure about the handedness?

[Mrs Figg]

Halfwise you know fanny means something completely different in England? poor old Ferguson taking a beating, it was him really wasnt it? I often wondered what a hookah pipe was, its just a euphemism isnt it?

[Pettytyrant101]

Fannies and wiping your arse with your hand- what has become of this thread!

[Amarië]

[quote="Orwell"]

An intelligent person, knowing about personal hygiene, would use toilet paper. Religion = Uncivilized Thinking, you see.

An intelligent person, knowing about personal hygiene, would wash their hands.

[halfwise]

Oh, and I think intelligent people use bidets. USA still has some catching up to do, and numerous tests prove it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C6r1IcY1pv0

(sorry about the advertisement)

[halfwise]

Halfwise you know fanny means something completely different in England?

Please enlighten me.

I often wondered what a hookah pipe was, its just a euphemism isnt it?

If I ever end up with smoke coming out of my hookah pipe I hope I'm in shape to remember it the next morning!

{{{Figg - you edited in the middle of my quoting you, this is a retaliatory edit!}}}

[Mrs Figg]

about the fanny or about the hookah pipe?

[[I think I am smoking a hookah pipe cos this is getting weird]]

[David H]

There is an argment America still practices slavery through its prison programs.

Where that argument breaks down is that we're getting almost no work out of 'em! I pay an arm and a leg in taxes to warehouse all these petty offenders, so you'd think come harvest time I could get just a few strong backs to help me in the field. But Nooooo! That would be slavery!

Halfwise, David if what you say is true about how single males are viewed whilst abroad I need to start travelling more! "Take me to the whores and drink I'm on holiday!"

No problem, Petty. I'll set you up! You don't mind if the drinks are drugged and you wake up naked and broke do you?
{{hmm... I might even be able to get a kick-back out of this }}

[halfwise]

See triple penultimate post.

[Amarië]

Oh, and I think intelligent people use bidets. (...)

Well, I'd still recommend washing your hands now and then. Though there are toilets now that wash and dries your bum.

[Pettytyrant101]

You don't mind if the drinks are drugged and you wake up naked and broke do you?- Halfwise

Thats just a night out in Glasgow.

[halfwise]

Would somebody please shake Figgy awake and have her explain to me what 'fanny' means in England??!

[Pettytyrant101]

Halfwise- how can I put this delicately, you know how in the US a fanny would be at the rear of a women- in the UK, in proper English mind, its at the front!

[halfwise]

You have GOT to be kidding me!

[odo banks]

A Gentlehobbit would not joke about something like that, Mr Halfwise!

[Mrs Figg]

Halfwise a fanny is a ladies front bottom or lady Garden

[halfwise]

Ya know, there was a Very Proper Victorian era American cookbook author named "Fanny Farmer". Doubt she would even be able to go out her front door in jolly old England.

[David H]

You don't mind if the drinks are drugged and you wake up naked and broke do you?- Halfwise

Thats just a night out in Glasgow.

Mistaken attribution again.

I know it's hard for some people to tell us hairy, spectacled Americans apart, but come on!

Halfwise is a rich urban hippy, and I'm just the poor county cousin.

[Wisey Banks]

In the bath
I saw my Nanny:
"Which side of you
is called a fanny?
As it appears to me
they both have crannies;
Please fill me in,
My dear ol' Nanny."

"For a start
you rude Grandsonny,
Bursting in like that
is not funny,
Oh Sweet Eru,
you cheeky bunny! ---
But as you're here
pass that towell, Honey.

"Now - on this side,
It's called my twotty,
And on this side
I have my botty -
and don't tell me it's
quite spotty!
Once on a time
It was quite a hottie. "

"But tell me the truth,
And end my fearin' -
Is it the front
or is it the rear end?"
"What are you 'fearin'?
My little queer one -
I have no idea
where you're stearin'?"

"Well, if you're fanny,
Dear Ol' Granny,
Is the one with
the biggest cranny,
That girl I loved
behind the tannery,
Was not 'Danielle',
But a boy called Danny!"

Channelled from "William Wordsworth's Secret Cache of Poems, 1873."

[David H]

Thank you, Wisey. That explains everything. {{almost too well }}

[halfwise]