Agent Nora and the TARDIS

10 minutes ago, obviously.

Wait, does this give any credence to the theory that you're actually a timelord?

I am so if one night you hear that familiar whoosh whoosh bump in the street outside. its me. get your coat on.

Dont suppose this means you are going to sonic my fridge clean any time soon? Im petty sure whatever is growing in there counts as alien life by now. And I dont like the way its started chuckling to itself either

you cant kill the life forms in your fridge, its against the Doctors principles.

Not if they are monsters, and Im pretty damn sure whatever is growing in their counts as a monster!

have you been experimenting with Geoducks again and spawning stuff?

Dunno, its been that long since I last cleaned in there, or in fact could get the door open (its got a hell of a grip the thing in there) I have no idea what it was originally. But it may have involved haggis, and batter and some spilled buckie I was saving for emergencies.

Mrs Figg wrote:you cant kill the life forms in your fridge, its against the Doctors principles.

You are so a timelord.

Mrs Figg wrote:  I am so if one night you hear that familiar whoosh whoosh bump in the street outside. its me. get your coat on.

I'll keep my coat on just in case.

Though if you're clearing out Petty's fridge, I guess there's no rush.

sounds like an episode of Who. Pettytyrant and the Fridge of Doom

You wouldnt be laughing it you could hear it plotting and squelching all night

Set your phazer to stun then ? ( & stand well back )

I dot have a phaser!- Ive got a stick for whacking haggis with. And I fear my stick isnt big enough

You say you hide things under your kilt, well, whip something out & put an extension on your haggis stick ! You'll also need riot gear & a shield, you got those yes ?

But I already keep my haggis stick under there.
And Ive never needed riot gear before- its amazing how few people want to hang about when a crabbit scotshobbit in a flapping kilt waving a haggis stick in one hand and a buckie bottle in the other comes screaming towards them.

But you still dont know whats in that fridge ! How vicious can it be ?
How long can it survive ? indefinitely ? What have you got that can distract it ?

I'm with Azriel here. Why not just try to befriend it? Who knows, you might end up liking each other.

'But you still dont know whats in that fridge ! How vicious can it be ? '- Azriel

I dont want to know! Its got suckers and gloopy bits probably and mouldy stuff and it burbles to itself, what more do I need to know?

'What have you got that can distract it ?'

I was hoping Mrs Figg with a mop and a bucket of disinfectant but that doesn't seem too likely

Maybe I need to just abandon barrel and build a new one, I hope I dont have to do that though, plumbing in the jacuzzi is always a nightmare.

I wann hear the rest of this story, do i end up with that tall redheaded hobbit u mentioned earlier?

dunno Norc but reckon the thing in pettys fridge might be lonely.

Agent Nora left the Doctor and the others on the beach tightly gripping the TARDIS key in her hand afraid to lose it. In the silver shimmery distance of the beach she could see Petty Meister waving his Geoduck about and a frisky donkey chasing him down the golden sand. Nora passed a kiosk seller, he had rows of oddly shaped veggies, winkles, cockles and chips. The sea air made her hungry so she bought some and wandered off to the fishing village. High on a cliff face was a ruined castle which she decided looked interesting. As screaming seagulls dived for her chips, Nora puffed up the hill towards the ruin. As she got closer to the castle the air darkened and a seamist shrouded the air with droplets of water condensing on her steaming food. A young man in a hoodie lounged by a stone wall smoking a fag. Nora nodded and moved into the circle of the ruin. ''I wouldn't go in there'' said the young man.
''why not'' said Agent Nora, ''I want to look at the view''
''well for one thing its a bit rude to walk uninvited into someones gaff, and another the last time a chick was invited in, she blew the place up without a by your leave. Left a load of bloody flowers, and buggered off!''
''gorp! said Nora, ''why did she do that?''
''dunno'' said the hoodie, ''maybe she was from Manchester or summat, they are pretty ASBO''
''who are you? do you live here? said Nora
''yep this was my home'' he said sweeping his arm out to encompass the castle.
''my name is Bungomancer Baggins, at your service, but you can call me Bungs'' he grinned

"gorp" is definitely my new favourite expression.