Agent Nora and the Moon of Loon

It was Winter in Svalfart, the Great Sea had frozen over and you could now toboggan or skate from the village to the city of Herringfartfard in a couple of hours. A freezing wind rattled the old wooden houses and people bundled themselvesup in furs and scarves to keep warm. A roaring trade in hot buckie and whisky swept the town, pack ice and snow feet thick lined the roads and made it seem like living in a large open igloo. Polar bears sometimes shambled in to town to rifle the dust bins and trash looking for tasty treats, people had to walk round with photos of DI Petty in a kilt on a windy day so as to scare the bears away, one peep was usually enough, and the great beasts would roll their eyes in disbelief and hurry off back to the ice tundra shaking their furry heads, they usually got over the shock in a day or two and would sneak back non the worse for their close encounter.
Agent Nora was worried, she had not seen Orwell her friend the pathologist for a couple of days, she wondered if he could have been trapped in his home with hungry bears roaming outside. She needed his advice for a case she was working on and decided to walk over to his house to check on him. Orwells wooden house showed non of the signs of a bear attack, scratches on the doors or broken windows. She knocked and waited, her breath like steam in the freezing air, she rubbed her runny nose with her sleeve, hankies were for girlie girls and Agent Nora was a daredevil, she loved storms and running barefoot over the mountains.
She was very different to her studious and yet scarily astute husband DI Eldo, he had a quiet yet sometimes ruthless sense of humour that sometimes made her wonder what went through his head, his practical jokes were renowned at the station for taking a sinister turn, for such a sweet looking chap he really did have a Machiavellian sense of mischief.

Nora waited for a few moments and then walked round to the back of the house, sometimes Orwell worked in his shed, what he got up to nobody knew, but he always looked flushed and slightly embarrassed when he emerged, little did the town know, but Orwell was a poet, and he wasnt looking at rude ladies, he was making up poems about them and trying to win the Svalfart annual bestest Channeller competition. The shed was full to the rafters with his cups and awards, his precious collection of naughtyness through the Ages.
Nora knocked and thought she heard a snuffling and a shuffling from behind the door, it sounded like an animal noise, oh no she thought, the bears have got in, maybe they have had Orwell for breakfast.
'Orwell Orwell! she shouted, 'where are you?, a moan answered her, a sad whimper, not of pain but of discomfort and irritation mixed up.
'Its ok Nora, said a voice, 'I am in here but I aint comin out for nobody', he said.
'why whats up', said Nora worried and concerned, she had never heard Orwell sound so discombobulated.
'Youll laugh, he said with a slightly more combatitive air.
'No I wont, said Nora, 'now come on I am getting worried and slightly freaked out'.
oh alright then, but dont say I didnt warn you, he unlocked the door and very slowly put his head round the door.
'Holy crap!, said Nora aghast.
Orwell was covered from head to toe in boar bristles, he had boar tusks, and furry ears,
'well dont just stand there goggling!, said Orwell in a bit of a huff.
'Nora felt a giggle well up from around her tummy, it made its way steadily to her twitching lips, and then exploded, outwards....
After the stomach cramps had subsided she looked up to see Orwell look at her with his usual urbane waspishness.
'If you will look in a mirror', he said with some satisfaction, you will see that I aint the only zoolander in town.
Nora stopped snorting suddenly and felt her chin.
A fine stubble of furryness was making its way up to her forehead, sharp teeth sprouted from her mouth, and a strange sensation came from her pants as a long tail snaked it way down her leg.
'ouch!, she said as she bit her lip with the fangs, 'Here comes the weirdness' she said wearily.

Agent Nora

Oooooh....

LeeLee

Orwell

Svalfart was decidedly an odd place and Nora and Orwell had had many adventures in the past, but this time she was a bit anxious. The furryness had slowed down somewhat, leaving her head and upper body largely free of the stuff, likewise Orwell, apart from the teeth and some whisps round the chin and forehead they were largely recognizable as human, but the lower parts were a different kettle of fish, they were totally animal, the legs ending in her case soft paws and in Orwells hooves.
'Nice isnt it?, said Orwell, 'I wonder if this is divine punishment for all my lady chasing, I get turned into a Satyr.'
'and what about me?, said Nora, 'I seem to be a Snowy Leopard of some kind, how do you account for that?'
'Dunno, said Orwell thoughtfully, 'But I intend to fully explore all my potentialities, and generally horse around he laughed he hehaw!'.
They both decided to throw down the gauntlet of ridicule and saunter into town as if nothing untoward had occured, they knew that sooner or later they would need food and Nora would get the urge for chocolate, so they padded and trotted warily and as quietly as possible down to the high street.
As they passed the end or Orwell's street a large dark shape materialized behind Nora and tapped her apologetically on the shoulder, Nora jumped, quite high as it turned out, her leopard legs springing with powerful cat muscles.
yeow!, she yowled and spun round, and looked down and then up and up at a huge gorilla standing in the road.
'Hi Nora, its me Turembar', said the gorilla, his long muscly arms waving a sweet hello. 'I see the zoo theme is fully operational in these parts' he said jovially. He casually munched on a green banana, 'you could have knocked me down with a feather when i woke up like this, this morning, well it would have to be a rather large feather, but you get the drift'.
'You dont seem phased by all this?, said Nora a bit surprised.
'Nah, said Turembar, 'its cool being a great ape, I love trees, and I love climbing them and looking at the forest canopy from up there', he gave a great meaty sigh, 'well I cant hang about talking to you lot, got stuff to see, swinging to do bye'.
and with one mighty bound was off into the snowy trees and disappeared.
'Well, said Orwell, I wouldnt like to standing under those trees when that banana sees the light again'.

Nora wondered if she Orwell and Turembar were the only people strangely transformed into animals, or maybe its the whole town, she thought. She had the idea that the animal largely echoed the character of the person underneath as it were. This could be interesting she thought.

The sun shone wanly down and the first delicate sprigs of the coming Spring were aleady showing through the rapidly melting snow. It had been a long hard Winter, but it was retreating fast, a bit too fast.
There was a steady drip drip drip from the trees and bushes, and a soft thwump! as the snow fell from rooves showering passing pedestrians and spraying cold ice water down the back of their necks. Green grass shot up and rivulets of melt water hurried to meet the rapidly defrosted Sea. Spring had definately sprung.

Orwell and Nora entered the town, and walked down the high street, a loud clip clopping could be heard, followed by a whiffle and a snort. DI Petty trotted up with quite magnificent antlers branching from his head, one of the odd things was he still had his woolly hat on, and another odd thing was he had grass tangled up in the antlers. 'What you been up to Petty?', said Nora, 'whats with the greenery?'.
Nobody seemed too bothered about the transformations, it was as if all was normal, as if it wasnt really a polite topic for conversation.
'erm I had a bit of a rukus with some PJ apologist' said Petty ruefully, 'we had a bit of a who's got the tuffest nut competition, I won of course, I am of course the King of the Glen, and Ive got the vegetation to prove it'. He did indeed look quite the proud herbivore, and they were all quietly impressed.

the king of the glen

Petty shook his head and his bobble hat spun across the road, he gave a great roar and a laugh that echoed down the street, he did look quite dangerous for a minute, but he winked at them and sauntered off with his hands in his pockets whistling.
This is getting curiouser and curioser she said fervently.
'Well when you have finished oogling Herne the Hunter, can we get on with finding out whats going on here?, said Orwell. Nora had the urge to roll around on her back with her paws in the air, but she resisted it, the human bits of her were getting annoying, she wanted to be fully leopard asap.
They walked on towards the town square, all around were signs of some half completed transformations and even some total immersions, all manner of squeaks, squalks, grunts and whinneys could be heard.
A very elegant and expensive looking dog ran up to them, it wagged its curly tail and shook its long mane of blonde hair, 'Hi guys', came halfwises voice, 'wassup?'.
'Halfwise is that really you?' said Orwell mesmerized by the tall creature, it looked like an Afgan Hound and was definately a thoroughbred, he had a diamond collar and looked kind of posh.
'Well my name was Halfwise, but my show name is Fergusons Droopy Dingbats the third.
'I prefer Halfwise' said Nora.
'Well seeing as its you, you can call me Halfwise, but dont let Ferguson hear you, he likes me to keep my air of Great Gatsbyesque Bon Ton dontcha know.
'Listen Halfwise its all very well, but we can't stay like this can we, I mean, its itchy for a start, Orwell was surepticiously scratching his bits, and then coughed as he saw them looking at him.
'What?'
'Orwell stopit'
'Spoil sport'
Halfwise grinned a doggy grin, which was surprising under all that hair, and thought for a bit.
'We need a Loremaster of course', he said.
'and I know just the fella'.

Mrs Figg wrote:Orwell

I'll never live that party or that photo down...

what?? whaaat?? everyone's turning into animals!

I can live with it if I get to be Monarch of the Glen!!

Thought she was getting her revenge on me, but it seems I'm not alone. Then again, we probably all deserve to be revenged upon. The Missus has a long memory, I'm afraid.

Dont you like being a posh doggie with long golden hair? I can turn you into a Lion if you want.