Critics review 'Desolation of Smaug' | POSSIBLE SPOILERS

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Post by Bluebottle Mon Dec 16, 2013 10:29 pm

So is your review on the way, Petty? Or did you collapse from tiredness from having to put too many " Banghead " and " Extremely Crabbit" in?

Laughing

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Post by Mrs Figg Mon Dec 16, 2013 10:35 pm

affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid 
Petty review affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid  affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid affraid 
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Post by Mrs Figg Mon Dec 16, 2013 10:58 pm

I can hear the patter of tiny feet. Its thousands of little Haggisii escaping Scotshobbitland. They can feel a storm brewing like birds before an earthquake. They are fleeing before its too late.

 pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale 
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Post by Radaghast Mon Dec 16, 2013 11:01 pm

Bring on the
Critics review 'Desolation of Smaug' | POSSIBLE SPOILERS - Page 24 Crabbit_small, PT!
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Post by Eldorion Tue Dec 17, 2013 12:34 am

bungobaggins wrote:Because Rich Evans plays "Fake Plinkett." He's not the same Plinkett from the reviews.

Rich Evans is actually the original Plinkett. He was playing the character before Mike started reviewing Star Trek, and later Star Wars and various other movies. Nod
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Post by Eldorion Tue Dec 17, 2013 12:35 am

Radaghast wrote:Bring on the
Critics review 'Desolation of Smaug' | POSSIBLE SPOILERS - Page 24 Crabbit_small, PT!

I rarely say this, but: OMG.

That is perfect. lol!
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Post by Radaghast Tue Dec 17, 2013 12:36 am

I might even go so far as to exclaim ZOMFG! Razz

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Post by bungobaggins Tue Dec 17, 2013 12:45 am

Eldorion wrote:
bungobaggins wrote:Because Rich Evans plays "Fake Plinkett." He's not the same Plinkett from the reviews.

Rich Evans is actually the original Plinkett. He was playing the character before Mike started reviewing Star Trek, and later Star Wars and various other movies. Nod

Yup, but we just call him fake plinkett anyway, because he's a fraud along with Mike and Jay and all those other hacks!

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Post by Eldorion Tue Dec 17, 2013 2:20 am

"The Hobbit: Part 2 of 3 (of 2 trilogies)" Laughing
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Post by halfwise Tue Dec 17, 2013 2:57 am

I'm disappointed that the Plinkett guys, given so much to work with, didn't run with it. They're obviously not Tolkien fans despite having fun with Smaug's name.

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Post by Eldorion Tue Dec 17, 2013 3:11 am

They've been pretty open about not being Tolkien fans in both their Hobbit videos so far. Shrugging

The Half in the Bag videos are rarely the intense circuses of mockery that the Plinkett reviews are, though.
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Post by Eldorion Tue Dec 17, 2013 4:23 am

Oh man, this brings back memories.  DOS must have people desperate.  I haven't heard this particular "explanation" of PJ's deviations in years. Laughing

http://www.theonering.net/torwp/2013/12/16/84878-are-we-watching-bilbos-memories/

As likewise established in the books, Bilbo begins work on his account (writing The Hobbit – the very book that you have read and loved!) a full sixty years after returning from his adventure with the Company. While sixty years may not be as large a portion of a hobbit’s life as it is a human’s, it is still a frightfully long span, and details would undoubtedly have been lost in the belated telling. Similarly, there would have been events that occurred in and around the Company of dwarves’ travels that the hobbit may not have been privy to.

This alone, from a storytelling and structural standpoint, is all the license the filmmakers needed to expand upon the text of the novel. You can either see Tauriel as an invented character, or simply as someone Bilbo had very little personal interaction with. After all, in The Desolation of Smaug, she is just one of the many Mirkwood elves to Bilbo’s eyes, and the two have next to no interaction. There is no evidence that he even knows her name.

As such, it stands to reason that Tauriel and nearly all she does could have been a key role in the Company’s adventure that Bilbo never wrote about because he wasn’t aware of her influence. Similarly, he would’ve been unaware of her friendship with Kili and how that bond and responsibility she feels for his fate is ultimately what drives her into leaving the borders of her land to help others.

Kili’s courage during the barrel escape and the splitting up of the dwarves at Laketown could be viewed as details forgotten by Bilbo, or deemed distractions from his narrative, for they would have been ultimately overshadowed by Kili’s sacrifice in the Battle of Five Armies. Similarly, the fact that some of the dwarves were split up on the journey is secondary to the fact they were all reunited again for the battle. Thorin’s attempts to kill Smuag while still within the mountain could have been blurred over time in Bilbo’s mind, for they were harried and ultimately failures in the face of Bard’s success.

It is fun to imagine that what we’re seeing on screen is the fleshed-out “reality” of the Company’s adventures rather than the (possibly limited) account Bilbo gives us over half a century after the events. How seriously Tolkien intended readers to interpret his words as Bilbo’s is unclear, however, the possibilities of opening the story up to influences outside of Bilbo’s knowledge is exciting.
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Post by Eldorion Tue Dec 17, 2013 4:27 am

Newsflash: it's okay to like the movie even though it's different from the book!  I've said for a long time that I think a large portion of PJ's apologists fall into that position because they are incapable of admitting that they enjoyed an unfaithful adaptation.  The problem is now compounded by the whole "fanservice for Ringers" style of TH (as that one review put it). The mental contortions are as impressive as they are as embarrassing.


Last edited by Eldorion on Tue Dec 17, 2013 4:28 am; edited 1 time in total
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Post by bungobaggins Tue Dec 17, 2013 4:27 am

Eldorion wrote:www.theonering.net/torwp/2013/12/16/84878-are-we-watching-bilbos-memories/

I saw that earlier. I thought I would try a little ELE. Rolling Eyes


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Post by Tinuviel Tue Dec 17, 2013 4:29 am

Shocked Wow. That reminds me of an abusive relationship, where the girl is constantly making lames excuses to stay with the guy.
And that made me think, are they even going to kill of Kili in TABA? It would seem like a waste after all the drama they put him through in DOS, which makes me wonder if Fili will die either, especially with that dropped hint in the film that he "will be king one day"...

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Post by Eldorion Tue Dec 17, 2013 4:34 am

I figured the "you will be king one day" line was because he was Thorin's heir in lieu of Thorin having any children. Shrugging But I'd say just about everything in the book is up in the air at this point. Razz
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Post by Eldorion Tue Dec 17, 2013 4:35 am

bungobaggins wrote:I saw that earlier. I thought I would try a little ELE. Rolling Eyes

I swear I'm trying. Rolling Eyes
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Post by bungobaggins Tue Dec 17, 2013 4:52 am

Even the most patient person has their breaking point.

So Bilbo would have forgotten about Azog entirely, and replaced the chase to Beorn's with a leisurely introduction?

Wow. These people will think of anything.

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Post by Forest Shepherd Tue Dec 17, 2013 7:08 am

The idea that what I am reading in The Hobbit is the written work of Bilbo is so utterly unnecessary, and awkward given the modern voice of the narrator, to my enjoyment of the story that I will never put any credence to the idea. I don't care what Tolkien apparently wanted; I read it as having a modern narrator.

And by the way, the title of that article is misleading. What the author is claiming is that we are watching what really happened, not the messed-up version that our silly, childish books contain.

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Post by Eldorion Tue Dec 17, 2013 11:20 am

Forest Shepherd wrote:The idea that what I am reading in The Hobbit is the written work of Bilbo is so utterly unnecessary, and awkward given the modern voice of the narrator, to my enjoyment of the story that I will never put any credence to the idea. I don't care what Tolkien apparently wanted; I read it as having a modern narrator.

The article doesn't even get Tolkien's conceit right. Tolkien "claimed" to have found the Red Book of Westmarch and translated its contents, but he also claimed to have edited and reorganized them into the works that were actually published. As you point out, the modern narrative voice in The Hobbit is quite clearly Tolkien's. Although a hypothetical PJ apologist could claim that's more evidence that the The Hobbit is not the "true" version of events and the filmmakers' changes are justified.

And by the way, the title of that article is misleading. What the author is claiming is that we are watching what really happened, not the messed-up version that our silly, childish books contain.

Yeah, it's pretty ridiculous. Even if you accept the basic claim, the scope of the changes in The Hobbit are too great for this excuse to hold. But really, it's a truly mind-boggling form of mental gymnastics when we have a much simpler explanation: that PJ by his own admission is not interested in adapting the book and freely made changes. I mean, I know a lot of people will claim that the movie was faithful (or not) based on how much they enjoyed watching the film, but this is a new level of drivel. Razz

*sighs* ELE, ELE, ELE come on Eldo, ELE.
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Post by The Wobbit A Parody Tue Dec 17, 2013 11:50 am

Eldo, it looks like I agree with you.

I think trying to align Tolkien's story and Jackson's story is academically interesting, but that's all. It seems to me that Jackson created a VERY free adaptation of The Hobbit. It reminds me of the difference between the James Bond movies and the Ian Fleming books. (I know that after Fleming's death, the films legally HAD to be different than the books.) The books and the films are both great, but for completely different reasons.

I liked DOS, but in a completely different way than I like Tolkien's book. And I like the book a lot more. It stands out in a way that the two movies don't. I like the children's-story aspect of the book, but that aspect didn't (mostly) make it to the screen: the talking animals, the 13 songs, the unarmed dragonslayers, the dwarves staying out of the mountain until Smaug left. The Rankin-Bass cartoon was far closer to the feel of the book, but I still liked the look of Jackson's film. And I liked both of those more than the Bakshi film, which was also closer to the books, but so... weird.

Of course, as the films depart from the book, it may make selling my parody of Tolkien's book more difficult. So it goes.
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Post by Mrs Figg Tue Dec 17, 2013 1:28 pm

Eldorion wrote:Oh man, this brings back memories.  DOS must have people desperate.  I haven't heard this particular "explanation" of PJ's deviations in years. Laughing

http://www.theonering.net/torwp/2013/12/16/84878-are-we-watching-bilbos-memories/

As likewise established in the books, Bilbo begins work on his account (writing The Hobbit – the very book that you have read and loved!) a full sixty years after returning from his adventure with the Company. While sixty years may not be as large a portion of a hobbit’s life as it is a human’s, it is still a frightfully long span, and details would undoubtedly have been lost in the belated telling. Similarly, there would have been events that occurred in and around the Company of dwarves’ travels that the hobbit may not have been privy to.

so thats it? poor old addled Bilbo forgot Tauriel and Akog being not dead, well that explains EVERYTHING  :facepalm: 

This alone, from a storytelling and structural standpoint, is all the license the filmmakers needed to expand upon the text of the novel. You can either see Tauriel as an invented character, or simply as someone Bilbo had very little personal interaction with.  After all, in The Desolation of Smaug, she is just one of the many Mirkwood elves to Bilbo’s eyes, and the two have next to no interaction. There is no evidence that he even knows her name.

maybe he just dreamed about her one night, he must have got bored in that palace

As such, it stands to reason that Tauriel and nearly all she does could have been a key role in the Company’s adventure that Bilbo never wrote about because he wasn’t aware of her influence. Similarly, he would’ve been unaware of her friendship with Kili and how that bond and responsibility she feels for his fate is ultimately what drives her into leaving the borders of her land to help others.

part from the fact that Kili went to the mountain with everyone and didnt get stuck with an arrow

Kili’s courage during the barrel escape and the splitting up of the dwarves at Laketown could be viewed as details forgotten by Bilbo, or deemed distractions from his narrative, for they would have been ultimately overshadowed by Kili’s sacrifice in the Battle of Five Armies. Similarly, the fact that some of the dwarves were split up on the journey is secondary to the fact they were all reunited again for the battle. Thorin’s attempts to kill Smuag while still within the mountain could have been blurred over time in Bilbo’s mind, for they were harried and ultimately failures in the face of Bard’s success.

they were locked up in the barrels doubt if Bilbo would have forgotten a small detail like that

It is fun to imagine that what we’re seeing on screen is the fleshed-out “reality” of the Company’s adventures rather than the (possibly limited) account Bilbo gives us over half a century after the events. How seriously Tolkien intended readers to interpret his words as Bilbo’s is unclear, however, the possibilities of opening the story up to influences outside of Bilbo’s knowledge is exciting.


FUN?? are you joking?
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Post by Ringdrotten Tue Dec 17, 2013 2:49 pm

"This alone, from a storytelling and structural standpoint, is all the license the filmmakers needed to expand upon the text of the novel. "

Jesus Christ, I am at a loss for words. To think I once visited TORn eagerly looking for news. I want to call them names... *must resist*.. Mad

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Post by Radaghast Tue Dec 17, 2013 2:59 pm

I don't know how you can even stand to read that shite Neutral

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Post by Pettytyrant101 Tue Dec 17, 2013 3:14 pm

Those are some severe mental gymnastics just to get around saying PJ and the Coven made a load of shit up instead of telling the book story!

Desperate times for PJ lovers it seems.

But did anyone seriously think ToRN would take an officially critical stand point and not just come up with a load of ( increasingly hysterical) defences of why PJ is still great and really does understand and love Tolkien.

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