continuing proofs America is wacko [2]

Wonderfully hysterical piece on the FOX News site. Its a rant against secularism and how America has lost its way as a nation by turnng from the Christian God. And it ends on a rallying cry, but I burst out laughing when I got to the bit Ive put in bold, it seems so wonderfully random- or is there some obscure connection I am missing here?

“If my people who are called by My name will humble themselves, and pray and seek My face, and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin and heal their land,” the Scriptures declare.
The most pressing problem facing America can’t be solved in Washington, D.C. True hope and change can’t be found at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. It can only be found at the foot of the cross on Calvary.
Our government may spy on our phone lines. It may throw us in jail. It may take away our photography shops and bakeries. It may demand to know the content of our prayers. But we will not be bullied. We will not be intimidated. We will not be silenced.

  

    bakeries.

There have been a number of high-profile cases lately where wedding-related business (including professional photographers and cake decorators) have refused to serve same-sex couples. Many of these cases have spawned boycotts and lawsuits, and the lawsuits that occurred in states which recognize gay people as a protected class have consistently found that the businesspeople were engaging in illegal discrimination.

Oh.  

I thought they were referring to the kind of bakery that bakes marzipan phalluses (or is it phalli? Never can remember  )

And what if there are a lot of them in one place? Is that a flock of phalli? A gaggle?

A phalanx of phalli.

 

Eldorion wrote:A phalanx of phalli.

  

I was thinking either "pride" or "hump".....

 

A Thwang of Phalli

  

National Masturbation Month was created by the Good Vibrations retail store in San Francisco following the firing of U.S. Surgeon General Dr. Joycelyn Elders in 1994 for suggesting that information about masturbation should be included in sex education courses.

Although it originally started as a form of protest and social activism, it has quickly evolved into an overall campaign to promote sexual health and the benefits of doing it yourself. No longer should people be ashamed of taking hold of their own bodies and experiencing pleasure and discovery.

In 1999, the Masturbate-a-thon was started as a sexual health fundraiser and sexual health awareness campaign and has quickly spread across the country and even the globe.

I wonder if they accept donations?   

That. Is awesome.

And on a semi-related note, some zealots couldn't help attacking Monica Lewinsky for actually looking cute in a recent photo. Fortunately other commentators are more rational.

http://www.thewire.com/politics/2014/05/female-columnists-still-deeply-concerned-about-monica-lewinskys-sexuality/361918/

Oh man, that piece by Ruth Marcus was a-may-zing.  Holy shit.  I suddenly wish I had been old enough to notice/remember the Lewinsky scandal as it happened.

Ruth Marcus wrote:Here is Monica, sprawled sideways on a velvet couch.  Her feet are bare.  Her arm is behind her head.  She smiles at something off-camera.  Her dress — here is the part where I venture into trouble, but it is a fact that cannot be ignored — is tight, straining at the chest.
To look at it is to think: Oh my, this poor woman has allowed herself to be used again.  I understand that there is a contrary narrative here—that Lewinsky has profited in the past from her sordid celebrity and is positioning herself (literally, I suppose) to profit once more. Maybe, but I find Lewinsky’s saga sadder than that account of cunning and manipulation.  She is forever trapped by being Monica, the Monica of the flashed thong and the stained blue dress.  And she has been seduced again, this time by the photographer and the stylist and whoever else is involved in setting up such a shoot, into displaying her sexuality.

I mean,

God forbid a woman who slept with the President actually have any agency of her own.  Nope, she's being seduced.  It's impossible that she might want to reclaim or own her own sexuality after being dragged through the mud for so long.

I remember watching this at the time, was funny then still funny now, not least because the whole scandal was weird from a European perspective- President gets blowjob from woman who is not his wife.




And you've got the French president at EU meetings with wife on one arm and mistress on the other.
Even our greyist, dullest PM John Major was at it.

Its always funny watching America get all childish and embarrassed by sex. Like the nipple at the superbowl- you would think America had been entirely unaware as to the existence of the female nipple until that moment from the outrage that followed.   

Eldorion wrote: I suddenly wish I had been old enough to notice/remember the Lewinsky scandal as it happened.

Trust me. You're lucky to be able to view it all through the lens of history.  

(Though if you're interested, watching reruns of the Bill O'Reilly shows as he flip-flops on the Lewinsky issue under pressure from FOX could probably be good fun!  )

Pettytyrant101 wrote:I remember watching this at the time, was funny then still funny now, not least because the whole scandal was weird from a European perspective- President gets blowjob from woman who is not his wife.




And you've got the French president at EU meetings with wife on one arm and mistress on the other.
Even our greyist, dullest PM John Major was at it.

Its always funny watching America get all childish and embarrassed by sex. Like the nipple at the superbowl- you would think America had been entirely unaware as to the existence of the female nipple until that moment from the outrage that followed.   

its hardly a Bunga Bunga party with coked up underage prozzies ala Berlusconi

Thats what I mean, from a Euro perspective this is not a scandal, its just a domestic, no ones business but theirs.
The idea that it somehow is enough to impeach a President and remove them from office is just funny.
America has a weird relationship to sex. They dont care less about seeing people gunned down, tortured and murdered, but show them an unexpected nipple and they act like a country of Victorian maiden aunts.

maybe its the 16th century Puritan roots, guns were needed to survive but sex was a sin.

Maybe the UShobbits can enlighten us as to why they are so scared of sex.   

'cause cute sexually confident women are terrifying.  Probably all atheists.

 

Mrs Figg wrote:
its hardly a Bunga Bunga party with coked up underage prozzies ala Berlusconi

I think there's an underlying assumption among many Americans that if you party like Berlusconi, you probably run your government like Berlusconi.  

Tight asses have tight purse strings. Supposedly.