Petty's Purist LotR Edits

[[[[[[[I'm glad you encrypted that - I don't think Beren and Tin would appreciate that comment much!]]]]]]]

[[[[[Insulting Beren is easy- its a week later you have to start worrying by which time he has usually just about managed to work out he was insulted in the first place!!]]]]

[[[[[[I suspect you are not aware that the old spell ((((( is broken, Ringdrotten.... I'd watch what you say. Everyone can read everything you say under it. Try [[[[[ --- that works --- unless someone gets boorish and breaks the new encryption spell. Err... and I assume Mr Tyrant is chatting back, I can smell currants and peppermint and something else I can't quite pick - or remember - just now, which scent is a sure sign of a new-type encryption spell being used!]]]]]

[[[[[Mr Tyrant! Both Tin AND Beren - I mean, Mr Tyrant, I know they're our Rulers and all - but they're Foreign as well. They really should stay in Valinor and Rule from there, don't you think? ]]]]]]

[[[[[[Oh Majesties, I have e-planteered Mirabella. She will start training a band of her Most Respectable Shiriffs ASAP. Can't wait for your atendance at the Picnic. With any luck, Mr Tyrant will show his true colours and be banished forever. Only because he deserves it, mind... nothing personal...]]]]]]

[[[[[[Odo I couldn't give a pair of fetid dingo's kidneys where they rule from so long as its NOT from my buckie tents!!]]]]]

[[[[[[[[ I have now edited the posts and replaced the broken encryptions with the new ones. Hopefully Beren did not see anything! ]]]]]]]]

[[[[[Oh those "Big Nobs"! Really, I'd prefer even Eldo's Rule to Foreign Rule. But I suppose one will just have to fix one's smile and be polite... Certainly wouldn't be wise to upset 'em ]]]]]]

[[[[[Dear Beren and Tin, your Majesties, I've heard that there is a bit of insubordinate treasonous talk going on behind your backs. If I hear anything "solid" I'll be the first to let you know! Your Humble Servant, Odo Banks, esquire]]]]]

[[[[[Well done, Ringdrotten. The less those "Foreigner Big Nobs" know of your private affairs, the better! ]]]]]

[[[[Odo does Valinor really count as foreign? It is attached to Forumshire in some weird universe warping way that makes my head spin like that time I accidently picked up that bottle of toilet cleaner instead of my buckie. Eldo is propabaly more foreign he's American!!! Surely that's far worse?]]]]]

[[[[[You make a good point. But they're a Man and an Elve - not Hobbits - don't forget that. As to Eldo, well, I guess we're stuck with the likes of Him - at least he resides in Forumshire-proper, not some semi-legendary back water! I mean, Bless Illuvatar and all that rot, but surely we're a more Modern place than that! A more Modern more Respectable place, that is. Feanor and his crowd were hardly Respectable, let's face it. ]]]]]]

[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[ Just letting you know, Beren can break encriptions!!! I don't know how he learned to do it (maybe because you're using my rosey peppermint perfume which happens to be his favorite so he can smell right through it), but he's catching on and so am I , so I suggest you all use some of my hair! He's never been able to get past that!!!!]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{This is better, and if anyone has a problem with me or Beren being here should say it to our faces. We demand more RESPECT than being talked about behind our backs }}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[AHA! I've broken in!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
....
Hey, where is everyone?]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]

{{{{{I was just getting the hang of the old, new one. And I ain't saying anything to Berens face not since last time- I a'int that brave!! And umm I'm sure Odo is patriotic really Tin- just mad that's all, poor soul, he is a Banks afterall!}}}}}

{{{{{I suspect Our Majesies are not quite getting this encryption thing at all... yaaaaaaaawn.... A terrible tyrannical King and Queen I can understand -- but nosey encryption breaking Kings and Queens is not only Scary, but terribly ... you know... yaaaaaaaaaaaawwwwwwnnn.... Hmm What? Did I just talk in my sleep?! Oh! Did I just read your encrypted message, Mr Tyrant? See where this "encryption breaking" behavior leads! Can no one have a private conversation anymore? }}}}}

Right enough! My crabbit meter is heading for the red and I'm running out of keys for new encryptions! Far as I know, what with Tin's hair being magical and elvish and therefore bloody weird the {{{{ encrytion is unbreakable! Not by Admin, and not even by Royalty themselves! So lets keep it that way, we need our encryption spells for our sanity {{{{{otherwise I cannot call the Banks a family of fat-heads!}}}}}

Where's that dratted Orwell go to? I'm expecting a deep, meaningful, insightful film analyses and what do I get? Nonsense! Good nonsense granted but nonsense none the less. What happened Orwell?

Yes, thanks Petty. At last, someone thinking reasonably.

{{{{{Where would we be if we couldn't, for instance, call the Banks family "fat heads"? This is all a terrible breach of privacy - maybe someone should cut off Queen Tin's hair. That'd fix the problem immediately. And if I find out she can read this "most" private encryption to you Petty, I'll scream - I really will! }}}}}

Sorry Petty - I can't seem to DO it re the Megaedit - and I want to. Please send a explanation e-palantir again. I will try again - I'm home for a few hours you see... (Please don't be crabbit with me ).

This place smells like a peppermint factory. At least until I stumbled into all this hair. Not even my hair, like usual. It's really tangly, too, I'm having to go carefully, elf though I be it's really hard not to trip, I know it must be attached to something... Watch ou-

(Various tumbling noises)

Hope I didn't pull anyone's hair out! I'm not sure I wanna tug on it to see.

Sent you a pm Orwell (palantir message).

"It's really tangly, too"- Baingil

Boy thats a brave thing to say about Queen Tin's hair.

Well, I'm getting into some parts that aren't tangly, but it's like... it was wrapped around something. I'd say it was wrapped around words but that'd be silly.

Frankly, Baingil, you don't seem to show the Queen anywhere near enough respect, getting into her hair like that. Off with your head (I'd suggest).


... and Petty --- I'm off to my e-palantir service - and post haste!

Surely no one can blame me, there's so much of it around here that it's impossible to find a space that does not have hair in it! Just look at thi- oh, wait, that's my hair there. But still, over there and there!

Queens can't half grow the stuff fast! Must be a royal wassisname, perogative type thing.

We elves have our magic, we do. Especially royal ones!

Well handy for when you want to let a Prince up your tower I'd imagine. {{{{{weird bloody bunch elves, their like ME hippies-give me down to earth, drunk as a skunk hobbits any day-with hair only in sensible places like their feet and at a sensible length!}}}}}

Prince? Nah, I have Eldo, Admin works for me. But it works for stringing bows, and a few strands can be used to tie things up in a pinch! Also hides small objects, or large ones, if it's really long.

"Also hides small objects, or large ones, if it's really long."