Things that are making you crabbit!

Hey thats great I was a bit worried, just give her some tuna and some cuddles and she will soon forgive you.

Im not sending you my sovvy rings though, thats what I use to open bottles of Thunderbird.

I didn't even know that hurricanes could reach Scotland, and that's clearly massive. I'm very glad your cat got back safe and sound, and I hope you all stay that way, Petty.

As you may(or may not..) know, I was out for a time last year because of a couple knee surgeries I had. Three to be exact. 2 were not anticipated, all three within 1 month. I tore my ACL and miniscus during a basketball game. Tomorrow, my I am playing the girl who shoved me and caused me to tear it. The thing is this; it wasn't her fault (entirely) because I was tired and my feet were all over the place, so when she shoved me, my knee just popped inward and pop goes the tendond! In my head, I know it wasn't her fault, and morally, I know I shouldn't be mad at her or blame her. However, I still find myself obsessed with this girl. I have this egocentric urge to let her know what happened to me. I don't even care if she feels bad about it. I don't even know if she knows what she did (though I did make quite a scene after it happened. It hurt!). Yet then, I'd feel embarassed for making such a fuss over it. See! I'm so confused!!!!!! I don't know how to handle this situation. I know it was unintentional to tear my ACL, but I don't think the shove was unintentional. What angers me most is that she probably doesn't care if she hurts someone. She never apologized. If she did, then good but I didn't hear her. I don't hold grudges, I just find it hard to move on from things that profoundly affect me. Anyway, how do I deal with the situation tomorrow? Do I give her a nudge? To I ram into her with my knee brace? Do I not do anything and pretend I don't remember her (Which would kill my ego)????

Very interesting story Petty. How do you know there was really a hurricane though? Maybe everyone had had bit too much buckie and all, oddly enough, had the same hallucination? You really must think of these things.

Tin, I am sorry for your experience with this girl, there are several courses of action here:
Deck her (a little violent but someone has to do it)
Repeatedly foul her (will result in not quite as much damage to her as deserved, but not as bad for you)
Cuss her out (definitely not the course I'd take, but I'm Mormon)
Pretend you don't remember her (no one gets hurt, but not as fun )
Or you could be a real suck up and nicely tell her what happened and forgive her

I partly agree with Lorient here! Be the nice one before the match. Tell her what happened, but without suggeting any of the blame was hers, and then judge her sincerity on her response.
If she seems genuine you can forgive her.
If she's a bitch about it or grudging on the other hand, pound her into the ground during the game.

I'm very sorry to hear that you were hurt so bad, Your Maj. Shockingly, I agree with both Lorient and Petty! (Is there something in the water?) I can't get behind the idea of decking or deliberately fouling someone else, but I think it's important to just go up and talk to the other girl. It gets the tension off of your chest and puts the ball in her court (metaphorically speaking, of course). If she's nice about it, then it was probably all an unfortunate accident, or at least something she regrets. If she isn't nice, then at least you know she's just an ass, and you can be the better person and move on with your life.

Having played Aussie Rules, generally as a forward - which means you get to kick goals, if you don't get killed by your oponent - I have been on the receiving end a few times. Whenever it happened, I planned my revenge and got 'em back, but sneakily. (They injured me sneakily, and so I returned the favour! ) Actually, I saw it always as a positive when defenders used rough house. Nearly every time I got belted or kneed in the back, I'd play better - if I wasn't carried off - because it was mostly talentless players who resorted to violent cheating. One punch in the back of my head and I'm thinking: "This guy's shirthouse. I'll kick a few today!" and usually did! Happy ending or what? (But there was always revenge down the track too! hee hee hee )

I can totally understand your feelings Tin, something similar once happened to me and it gets under your skin and its difficult to let go, cos of the built up anger, part of me wanted to thump this person in the head with a cricket bat and the other more reasonable part of me realized I was not the sort who could exact revenge without guilt, so i just went up to the person and told them they had hurt me, a lot, and how angry i was about it. unfortunately the person didnt give a monkeys, so i let rip, calling them various choice names only a sailor would use, anyway the anger was vented, and i felt much better. Obviously if the person had been calm and polite and surprised they had hurt me, so would i have been, so it depends on the reaction you get, but in my experience, say something, get it out of your system otherwise it will fester. and make sure if they are bigger than you, to do it in a safe environment.

Fine words, you guys, fine words indeed... but, well, revenge is sweeter.

See, I would go and talk to her if if hadn't been almost a year ago, and if I didn't detest her so much because she kind of is quite bitchy. I don't really want her symapthy. I just want her to feel a bit guilty. But I'm kind of shy, and preferably like to avoid confrontation verbally, which is why I'm afraid I'll do something stupid on the court. Also, my sister is on the team... so I think I don't have to worry about "revenge." She's got it covered I'm just afraid confronting her would leave a very awkward moment, like she doesn't remember me at all (not likely, but..) or she actually feels bad and then I'll feel like a bitch bringing it up. That's what I'm most uncertain about. But I swear if she hurts someone else on my team, I'll
Thanks for the help everyone!

And for the record, she's shorter, but stockier than me. And slower, so she shoves people. We've kind of been going at each other since my freshman year. I didn't like her because she thought she was the s#%t, when she really wasn't because I'd blocked her a million times. We've just had a history of not liking each other.
If it wasn't really her fault, than I don't have to forgive her for anything! That way, I can just shove her around like I'd shove anyone else around!!!

I'm such a drama

Go get her your Maj. If you know she's a bitch already then move to stage 2 of my advice- pound her into the ground!

Tinuviel wrote:And for the record, she's shorter, but stockier than me. And slower, so she shoves people. We've kind of been going at each other since my freshman year. I didn't like her because she thought she was the s#%t, when she really wasn't because I'd blocked her a million times.

From that I assume you were the guilty party all the time and got what you deserved. (Mind, she's got no excuse for being short, fat and useless - so maybe revenge is still in order! )

I'm continuing to mull over your predicament and it just occurred to me. If you're as much of a bully on the basketball court as you are to your Servants and Slaves in Forumshire, is it any wonder that the squat rotund upstart pushed you? Also, it's hard to imagine that someone would push you with the intent of hurting your knee. Me, I would have kneed it "accidentally" while rebounding. Not that I ever did that when playing basketball. I was a Saint - always - when playing sport. As Odo would say: Here to help!

Well I can kind of hear the guffaws and snorts of laughter from across the globe, but I am quite shy too, and had some pretty bad bullying as a kid. but I toughened up pretty sharpish when I moved to a new country, I say if you dont talk to this lardy shover you wont be able to get it out of your system and youll keep thinking and thinking about it and get more pissed off by the week. Best to just take a deep breath walk up to her and say, Do you know you pushed me last year and really damaged my knee? see what her reaction is, then decide the next step.. better out than in that anger, lifes too short to let stuff worm away your peace of mind.

And you could also just play brilliantly, Tin, like I've already suggested, and so (figurativerly speaking) stick it right up her nether regions big time. That was always my policy. In spite of my big talk above, I never played like a coward with the intent of damaging others, unless it was hurting someome accidentally because they were in the way when I was going for the ball, or when tackling. I'm very honrable that way. Maybe you should be too. I've coached kids in basketball for years. I tell them to play the ball, cop the whacks in all sweetness, and learn to suck it up if others are arsewipes. (I don't actually use the word arsewipes, mind, as that kind of language is no help when I'm flirting with Yummy-Mummies!) I wouldn't bother talking to the other girl. Just continue blocking her. That sounds a more than satisfactory way of dealing with her. (Mrs Figg's a bit too deep and thoughtful for me. My daughter is deep and thoughtful - and therefore easy prey for bullies. Indeed, so am I. I compensate by being myself and taking every chance - fairly - to make absolute bullying p*#^ks look sub-standard. ).

Sounds good advice from everyone, you just have to decide what is the best step for you. Whether you decide to play better than her, or to let her know what she did, or to pound her into the dust, just do what feels right in your guts.

"Stomach" Mrs Figg - "stomach!"

Mrs Figgs you are probably not aware of this, being new in these parts, but due to unforeseen legal reasons (unforseen by the lawyers of Pure Publications that is) there has been some trouble over the Dear Jane problems page n the NotP, which is why it has not appeared for some time. And the editors have asked me to see if you would consider taking on the job based on your comments here, and you'd be sharing a page with Mystic Mog and you don't seem to mind pussy hair which is a bonus.

Mrs Figg, Mr Tyrant - "Mrs Figg." Are you trying to annoy her with this "Mrs Figgs" business - or just me! The poor woman has enough "issues" to deal with, without you insulting her with these repeated misspellings of her name...

As to her giving advice in the absence of Jane (and I hear Jane is very busy at the moment, having had to take over Level Two Naked Callithenics Class when old Rory Boneknuckle slipped a disk) I think she could do it. The discipline of giving Respectable advice to folk might help get her own Mind in order. (I will not need her for long periods as my Intern - just a few minutes here and there).

"Are you trying to annoy her with this "Mrs Figgs" business - or just me!"

Just you. Actually you can use it as a buckie indicator, if I use Mrs Figg I am just drunk, if its Mrs Figgs I am really drunk.

okey dokey, let me know what to do.

All I an say is: "Ask Mrs Fig."

Just letting you all know how it turned out.

So, by sheer coincidence, I ended up guarding her! Hah! she's not as short as I thought (almsot my height) and be sure I played her roughly. Not flagrantly, but I definitely gave her a hard time. I shot right over her too! HAHA!!!! Not to mention, most of my team wanted to beat her up, too. But it turned out she barely even played. I played way longer and better than she did. She definitely didn't have half as much confidence as she used to. I feel almost as though she's stuck on earth while I've risen above and I'm just floating grinning at her cynically. I kind of pity her. So I've forgiven her (if that's what you want to call it) and now I just don't like her one bit and I'm gonna mess with her whenever I can just for sport. But I''ll be a GOOD sport. I even tried to help her up after she fell down (whether I was the cause I don't remember, but she kind of ignored my hand. Not sure if she didn't see it or if she was being a bitch tho )

Thanks for the help everyone! Much appreciated!

Did you play somewhere in Forumshire, Tin? It's startng to sound like it? The bile! The anger! The vengeance! I'm getting some popcorn and a coke, and I'm gonna watch this space from now on.

Sounds like you handled things well, Tin! I'm glad that you were a good sport; I think that was definitely the right thing to do. And congrats on a game well-played!