A Midsummer Nights Dream (in Forumshire)

have you tried this petty?- Norc

No! I just thought it was a funny image.  

i am currently waiting for petty to get his arse kicked my ringo

Pettytyrant101 wrote:have you tried this petty?- Norc

No! I just thought it was a funny image.  

 i don't believe u.

petty, i want more story. this is pure and epic brilliance. completely bonkers, but i love it. more.

Let us turn the mind towards the dell, where once the ladies of Forumshire slept and now the remains plan and set on their way.

Over the brow of the dell came Azriel, hat firmly attached and stride determined with Halfwise bounding behind her despite her doing her best to completely ignore his attentions, beside her was Amarie recording the nights events with increasing interest, and then Norc, whose face was a carefully crafted etching in barely controlled fury.

“I've decided what I'm going to do when I find them,” Norc growled.

“Oh yes?” Azriel enquired carefully.

Yeah,” Norc replied out of the corner of her mouth, “I am going to fucking kill them. And then I'm going to do it again a lot fucking worse.”

“That is very diplomatic of you Norc,” Amarie said, “but perhaps you best leave this to the experts in magic.”

“If it fucking well is magic,” Norc said darkly.

“Its magic all right,” Azriel confirmed with a nod as they entered the eaves of the wood, “I'm vibrating like the Bargain of the Month in the Especially Discreete section of Figg's Eel Shop.”

They passed under the trees and it was immediately darker and still night under the leaves.

A little way off they could hear a voice saying “She doesn't want a boy Eldo, she wants a man and not a drunken one either, a real man, who knows how do to, manly stuff.”

“Was that Orwell?” Amarie asked surprised.

“Come on,” Azriel said beckoning over her shoulder, “it was this way.”


David, Lance and RA (somewhat stiffly) stared upwards into the canopy of trees.

“Lance?” David said slowly.

“Yes, Dave,” Lance replied without taking his gaze away.

“Is that Eldo, up a tree, holding onto Figg whist Orwell tries to climb up to them professing his love and demanding a fight to the death?”

There was a pause.

“Yes, it is Dave,” Lance eventually replied evenly.

“Thank Eru for that,” David said relieved, “I thought I was going mad.”

“Maybe we've both gone mad, again,” Lance said.

“Well have we or haven't we gone mad again?” Dave asked anxiously.

“I'll ask RA.”



Let us turn now to the edge of Russet bog in the thin yellow pre-light of rising day, where quite possibly the strangest event to ever be witnessed in all of Forumshire is about to unfold, and perhaps a greater claim, its strangest ever conversation.
Let us witness and hear, and judge for ourselves.

Ally got up from the tree stump she had been sitting on and walked casually across the open space of tall yellow grass, hands in her pockets. She stopped about halfway between the stump and the reed strewn edge of the bog and nudged an acorn shell that lay there with her foot.

“You can come out,” she said, “I know you are in there.”

She turned around and walked back towards the tree stump, behind her Cc clambered from the shell suspicion written all over her face.

“How did you know?” Cc asked.

Ally half turned her head back and smiled but said nothing. She sat back on the stump, and let her legs dangle over the side, swinging a few inches above the mossy roots.

“You don't know who I am, do you?” Ally asked, then said quietly as if to herself, “but, then you wouldn't, would you?'

“And who am I to tell you?” Cc retorted with her hands on her hips, “I'll always catch you when you fall.”

“Yes, yes you do, don't you,” Ally murmured to herself, then said louder, “that won't work on me you know. I can match you Cc, even beat you, if I have to.”

At the use of her name Cc looked openly startled and Ally knew she had scored a point, this was about the oldest power, all the words now were important, you could possess a thing by knowing the right words.
Ally swung her legs looking the picture of calm coolness but inside her heart was thumping.

“You can't match me,“ Cc said angrily, “you can't tie me.”

Ally looked Cc in the face, wondering at it, so familiar. “I could live forever in your garden,” she offered with real feeling, “Ah yes,” she sighed, then in a challenging voice said, “Yes I can, yes I can.”

“Game on!” said Cc with a grin and spun on the spot then twirled in a blur in a ring right around Ally sitting on her stump and reappeared where she had begun.

Ally remained unruffled, “Whatever our souls are made of yours and mine are the same,” she said slipping from the stump and standing to face Cc and saw her wince.

“In jealously there is more of self love than love,” Cc said defiantly and leapt atop a reed and stood poised there on one foot with her other leg extended straight out behind her, she shielded her eyes with one hand and looked off into the distance.

Ally shook that one off, refused to let it show outwardly, it was key to not give Cc satisfaction until the moment was ready, and the words would dictate the right moment, if she placed them right.

She strode nonchalantly towards the reed Cc was absurdly perched on, saying, “What do you think of my Casasola dress? Kate says its cute but I think it might be too beautiful to bear,” she asked holding out for inspection the hem of a dress she was not wearing.

The reed Cc stood upon bent a little, “and my kick-hi boots?” Ally indicated the boots she also did not have on, “aren't they just the best? Blue is the colour of love when seen from inside a song.”

The reed beneath Cc bent further, “And how about my whimsical pandita hat?” Ally titled a hat she was not wearing at Cc, “is it too much? Kate likes how the ribbons flow in the wind. She says it reminds her of kittens crying on rainy days. I asked her if the day was rainy when they cried or if she only thought of them crying when it was a rainy day but she wasn't available for comment. I was so sad.”

The reed snapped and Cc leapt from it, somersaulted over Ally and landed crouching on the spot and frowning.

Ally turned casually around to face her.

“Mirror, mirror on the wall,” chanted Cc, “whose the real one here after all?”

Then she crept along the ground towards Ally who remained unmoving.

“My girl Josephine,” Cc purred, “Where's Kate now Ally?”

Ally felt that like a slap and involuntarily she took a step backwards and Cc smiled and sprung up onto her feet, “Kate,” she said, “Katie beautiful Katie.”

Ally fell further back her shoulders slumped a little but she held her head high and tried to keep it looking passive and cool, “you're the only girl that I adore,” Cc whispered breathlessly drawing ever closer as Ally retreated back towards the edge of the bog.

“When the moon shines over the cowshed,” Cc intoned.

Ally fell to her knees and said between gritted teeth as if out of pain, “I'll be waiting at the kitchen door,” her head slumped forward, “Oh Kate!”

Exhausted her arms hung limply at her sides. There seemed to be no fight left in her, and no words left to say.

Cc laughed, “Mortals should not play at faerie games. We see where the daggers are hidden.”

She laughed again and pleased with herself spun away.

i got it!

Ask and you shall receive Norc, well at least once in life, and you just used yours up on a silly story.  

Eldorion wrote:I'm pretty sure I was the one who messaged you on FB in the first place.

In any event, I've found things run smoother here when everyone remembers Forumshire Rule #4.

http://www.hobbitmovieforum.com/t2-note-the-dead-easy-rules

When I followed that link I saw that GB was the first to reply to it - where is the old bugger? Are you still in contact with him on Facebook, Eldo? Seeing his avatar reminded me of the fact that I miss him

"Hey! Ive been on the internet long enough that I can remember when you had to wait twenty minutes for a picture to download far enough to see a nipple!" - Petty

Quoted because it's gold

On a more on-topic note: Read the sixth installment, and enjoyed it a lot - Eldo and Figg's craziness especially I love your language when you describe stuff, Petty - you write like someone who loves being outside among trees and hills, and to another who takes pleasure in such things your descriptions make it easy to visualize them

Thanks Ringdortten.
Yeah I do love being outdoors and I love trying to capture it in words when I'm indoors.  

Pettytyrant101 wrote:Ask and you shall receive Norc, well at least once in life, and you just used yours up on a silly story.   

 damn. but it's not that silly.

ooooh... i loved the latest instalment and i love that whole Lance/Dave/RA repeat

Final part. Hope you enjoy.




“So what do you see RA?” Lance asked.

“I see Eldo holding Figg in his arms and Orwell climbing the tree, well the weddings definitely off if Petty sees this,” he added and David immediately clapped a large farmers hand over RA's mouth.

“Shh!” David said, “that's exactly the sort of thing saying out loud could get you killed for in Forumshire,” he let RA go, “honestly I sometimes think you've got a death wish RA.”

“So Eldo is with Figg now, Petty is with Tinuviel,” Lance ruminated, “I wonder what's happened to Halfwise then?”

“He's over there, with the girls,” RA said not realising pointing out the blindingly obvious could get a person killed in Forumshire.

“There are no girls here,” Lance retorted.

“What about those ones then?” RA said choosing to defy any potential threats of being killed in Forumshire for pointing them out and pointed them out with one stiff arm.

“Hi” Amarie said with a smile, “Have you seen Figg and Eldo anywhere?

“As a matter of fact yes,” David replied, and just at that moment Orwell's voice came floating down to them  saying, “I love you more than the world itself Figg and I will save you from beardless youths and intoxicated Scotshobbits if it kills me, or you. If it comes to those circumstances however, preferably you.”

“They are up there,” Dave finished, pointing up the tree. They all looked upwards.

“I don't suppose you have any idea what's going on do you?” David asked hopefully.

“Not really, no” Azriel replied with a shrug, “but we better get them down.”

Norc pulled out her large hatchet, “I'll soon get them fucking well down,” she said with a glint in her eye and swung at the tree.

“Norc no!” Azrel called, restraining her with a strong hand on her shoulder, “Amarie and I will handle this one.”

Azriel nodded to Amarie. They both gestured in the air, a black slit in the air opened up before Amarie and she disappeared into it and reappeared at the top of the tree where she grabbed Figg by one arm, as she was still clinging to Eldo in turn all three disappeared into the slit and re-emerged safely at the trees base.

At the same time Azriels'  more direct, but no less effective approach was to send a zapping bolt of lighting from her fingertips to Orwell's posterior and with a yelp he fell from the tree and landed in a particularly prickly gorse bush clustered round its base.


Just at that moment there came a flurry of sound from the forest behind, the snapping of branches and suddenly the shrill blowing of a horn.

Petty burst into the clearing, arms waving and ran straight into the tree, he fell to the ground as three arrows whistled through the space he had been in and stuck firmly in the trunk at head height.

Petty thrashed about cursing on the floor unsuccessfully trying to get back up as Ringdrotten, Rhaddy and half a dozen very angry elves emerged from the trees weapons drawn.

Azriel nodded to Amarie again, this would take a special sort of magic, they both stood forward and Azriel said in tones that admitted to argument, “And just what do you think you are doing?”

To which Amarie added, “And look at the state of your uniforms.”

The power of motherhood came through strong and clear and instinctively Ringdrotten and Rhaddy hung there heads and muttered sulkily, “Its his fault,” and pointed at Petty who was still floundering around occasionally shouting “Help!” from within the suit and leaking buckie.

“Don't tell tales,” Azriel admonished sharply, putting all her skills into the correct modulation, Ringdrotten hung his head suitably in response.

Petty regained his feet and finally saw through the head Figg standing beside Edo, he lurched towards her arms outstretched, all eight of them and tripped, landed on top of her and they both went down onto the forest floor with a squelch of buckie.

“Oh ya bugger!” Petty mumbled from within.

Figg could not express herself through lack of air and sudden buckie fumes that were emitting  from every part of the costume.

“Petty?” she finally managed, “is that you in there?”

“Aye its me yi daft bizzum,” Petty said sharply from inside, “Ah've missed you hen.”

“Get off me!” Figg managed and shoved Petty aside where he rolled onto his back tentacles waving.

“I don't love you any more,” Figg yelled at Petty.

“Whit?” Petty managed between pathetic attempts to get back up.

"I love Eldo now,” she added and strode over to Eldo who still felt spontaneous but not necessarily safe any more.

“Dave, Halfy, someone!” Petty yelled, “Git this thing aff o' me and we'll soon sort this oot right noo.”

Nobody moved.

“Get this bloody aff me!” Petty yelled and hesitantly David and Lance went over to him and unfastened the catches and zippers on the back of the huge head.

Petty took in a breath of air as everyone else took several steps back and held theirs.

“Right!” Petty said striding over towards Eldo, “ So yi love this whipper snapper now di yi Figgs?” he demanded.

“Yes,” Figg replied, “he's young, and he's full of life, and spontaneity and he's sober.”

“And whits his good points?” Petty quipped.

“This!” Figg said and she grabbed Eldo by the ears and kissed him long and hard, “There! What do you think of that?”

Orwell emerged from the bush at that moment to see Figg attached to Eldo's face like a limpet and he squealed in disapproval, “Get your hands off her Eldo!” he demanded, even though it was clear who was doing the kissing.

“And what's it to you?” Petty demanded temper rearing.

“I love Figg more than any other,” Orwell declared.

“Right! “Petty said and strode at Eldo who was too slow to back off in time, "Two cun play at this game."

Petty grabbed Eldo, putting one calloused tobacco stained hand either side of Eldo's head.

“Oh dear Eru he's going to headbutt me!” Eldo thought in panicking fear, but as Petty moved closer a worse thought occurred to him, “Oh dear Eru, he's not going to headbutt me.”

Petty's lips met Eldo's and the world swam.

Petty held on for dear life, lips locked to Eldo's in a loud sucking smack as Eldo went from pale red to bright red to purple and eventually an off shade of blue.

“He's going to kill him!” Norc squealed and charged at Petty, knocking him aside from Eldo who collapsed to the ground gasping for air.

Immediately Figg was by his left side and Norc by his right and almost together they both asked “Are you ok Eldo?”

“Piss off bitch,” Norc hissed over Eldo at Figg.

“I will do,” Figg retorted, “But I'll be taking Eldo with me.”

“Oh we will see about that!” Norc exclaimed drawing out her hatchet but just then Eldo coughed and swayed.

“Eldo?” Norc said reaching for him, "can you hear me?”

“I think,” Eldo said slowly and with some consideration, “that I might be drunk.”

He fell over unconscious.

“Well anyone can do that!” Orwell said suddenly not to be outdone in the eyes of Figg, he grabbed Petty and planted a huge kiss on him.

A few seconds later Orwell collapsed to the ground choking.

“Oany wan else want a shot?” Petty demanded and everyone else backed off further.

Ringdrotten stepped forward, he had a crossbow, bolt drawn, pointed at Petty's head.

“I'll take a shot,” he said.





Let us return now to the edge of Russet bog where the first rays of morning are peaking over the horizon and splitting long shadows among the reed beds.

Cc spun delighted with herself and then turned to walk away triumphant when Ally raised her head and said steadily, “You are right Cc, mortals shouldn't play at faerie games, and you dear Cc, are exactly as mortal as I.”

Cc stopped dead in her tracks.

“Oh though invisible spirit,” Ally said slowly rising to her feet, “if thou hast no name to be known by, let us call thee devil.”

Cc turned to face her, there was a tear rolling down one cheek. “You cannot find peace by avoiding life,”she said to Ally.

“Life is a luminous halo, a semitransparent envelope surrounding us from the beginning of consciousness to the end,” Ally replied, and now a tear  rolled down her cheek too, “You, me, handcuffs. Game over.”

They faced each other across a few feet of scrubby unkempt grass as the sun rose above Russet Bog and bathed it in a watery orange light, and outlined against it in profile their likeness was all too clear.

Cc laughed, “Snap!”she said ruefully, “we play well. What now Shadow?”

Ally smiled, “You undo what has been done. Do what you do best, turn it all into just another midsummer nights dream in Forumshire.”

Cc tilted her head, put on her best Family Guy voice pointed at Ally and said “Ha! Ha! She said it!”

Ally bent down and picked up the acorn shell.

Cc smiled in return and laughed, "All is unwound and undone" she said and leaped twirling into the air and disappeared within it with words, "well almost all."

Ally tucked the shell away into her trouser pocket, then gave it a gentle pat, before walking off back toward Needlehole in the refreshing morning light.


And so enchantments are undone and night breaks way to day and each one awakes in their place, though not all where they were.
In the dell the girls sleep soundly in their tents, but at Azriel's door Halfwise sleeps the sleep of the unknowing contended.
In a bower in the woods where a Queen once loved a beast Petty snores to awaking, with Figg at his side.
And in a clearing, strewn with flowers soft with morning dew Eldo slumbers with Norc sleeping frowning on his chest.

Petty woke and scratched, his motion disturbed Figg who yawned beside him.

“Ma heid?” Petty said rubbing his forehead, "I hud the strangest dream,” he said then after a pause added, “I think.”

“What time is it?” Figg asked sleepily, her cascade of red hair pointing at all cardinal points at once, then slowly she turned to look around herself at the glade and the bower of flowers and then finally at Petty.

“Petty?!” she demanded.

Petty patted himself to make sure, “Aye, I think so,” he said still feeling confused.

“How did we get here?”

“I never ask that question,” Petty replied solemnly.

“I was camping with the girls,” Figg added with a frown, “and then,” she frowned some more, “oh it doesn't matter. Come on lets go find them, we are getting married today aren't we?”

Petty looked her and then said with passion, “Aye lass, we are that.”

She smiled at him, not sure why, but for some reason she felt more certain than ever before. Maybe she had just had enough of living in her own past. It was not new adventures and new horizons she wanted, it was a travelling companion for the everyday roads and there was no one looked more like they belonged on a road that Petty, although that was mainly because of a passing resemblance to road kill.

They hurried out of the glade together and a short way away passed a clearing.

Norc and Eldo were there, being spontaneous as it turned out.

“Blimey!” Petty remarked peering between the branches, “I wouldn't have thought Eldo would be doing that without the proper paperwork!”

Figg dragged him away and they headed giggling  for the edge of the woods.


Azriel straightened her hat and looked at herself in her small hand mirror. Being of the witchy persuasion came with some benefits, one of them was an exceptionally good memory. A memory that was particularly good in fact at remembering things that had now never happened.

She left the tent and saw Halfwise lying curled there guarding her door although she was sure he would not be able to tell her why if she asked him.

She smiled down at him and nudged him awake with her foot.

“Halfwise,” she said clearing her throat as she said it, he turned upwards to face her, or at least so she hoped, his eyes were lost beneath the all over fringe, “I just wanted to say, you know, if you ever want to drop by my cottage sometime, well there's a warm spot in front of the fire, and I've some magic books written by those wizards up at the brewery that are all numbers and triangles, not that I hold with that sort of thinking, but there you are, they are there if you ever want to stop by and read them,” she stopped to try to judge his reaction but before he could speak she plunged on, “but I want to make it absolutely clear there will be no,” she stopped and made some vaguely suggestive shapes with her hands in the air in front of herself, “not in my house whist I've still go the breath left in me to beat you to death with a poker. But otherwise, well, you'd be very welcome.”

She nodded as if satisfied she had said all that needed to be said and turned round and began walking off down the hill towards Needlehole but stopped after only a few paces and turned back to him, “And I might rub your tummy, every now and then, if you behave yourself,” she said waving a finger at him, “but that's not a promise or anything.”

She turned away again and continued her walk down the slope.

Halfwise watched her go. He was confused but he was also smiling happily from ear to ear behind the hair.

David, Lance and RA slowly came too at the edge of the woods.

RA was still in his robot suit.

“That was a terrible nights sleep,” David said with a groan.

“I'm not sure we did sleep,”  RA said slowly, prodding just the sort of avenue of speculation that could get a person killed in Forumshire.

David and Lance frowned at him.

“What?” RA said, stiffly getting to his feet and standing there like an angry starfish, “What? Was that one of those things that you can get killed in Forumshire for saying was it?” he demanded.

David and Lance shared a glance but did not say anything.

“Well, you know what?” RA said angrily, “I don't care! There! I've had enough of this, I'm going home and I'm taking the shortcut through Russet Bog.”

And with that he spun on the spot and marched stiff limbed off into the trees.

“RA!” David called after him, “you don't want to do that.”

Lance turned to David with a shake of his head, “That's the last we will see him. Doesn't he know taking a shortcut through Russet Bog will get you killed in Forumshire?”

Amarie was packing her things away and just about to open up an exit directly to her Ambassadorial residence andd a hot shower when she saw Figgs and Petty approaching the rear of the dell from the woods.
She waved at them and awaited their approach.

“You two shouldn't see each other before the wedding!” she admonished.

“We dinnae care,” Petty said happily.

Just then a distance voice rose up out of the woods, “Raskere! Raskere!”

“Was that Norc!" Amaria asked with an arched eyebrow of suspicion, "what's she doing?"


“Um, sledding?” Figgs suggested hesitantly.

“And where's Eldo?” Amaria asked with an even more arched eyebrow of suspicion and a faint smile playing on her lips.

There was a long pause.

“Getting a sleigh ride?” Petty said even more hesitantly.





And so the wedding of Petty and Figg's came to Needlehole.
And the Town Hall thanks to Chris' hard, if not entirely tasteful, work was bedecked in things that sparkled, shimmered and gleamed in the fair and bright afternoon sun.

Streamers blew in the wind in many colours, music played and folk danced and ate and drank until they were equally filled with happiness as they were good food and spirits.

And nearby, leaning on a wall and observing two figures stand.

“Call that a wedding, not one of them in crinoline,” Cc remarked.

“And not enough 80'wedding music, its like they didn't even read my memo, not one birdy dance and I didn't hear a single Shakin' Stevens song either,” Ally grumbled.

“Want to blow this place and go mess with some threads while everyone is busy?”

Ally grinned at her.

“Lead the way my sibling masquerade.”

He really does have a death wish.

Norc wrote:regarding the rules. i think the top two are.. welll.... broken

I honestly don't.  There are tons of suggestive posts and some that toe the line of perhaps unacceptability, but no one has been posting pornography.  And most of the arguments on here are tongue in cheek, but when someone takes genuine offense to something we (meaning the mods; I can't speak for everyone else) do our best to take it seriously and resolve the issue so that everyone comes away happy.  If I thought I saw pornographic or abusive posts then I would do something to stop it, but people here do a good job of self-regulating within the norms of our community.

Ringdrotten wrote:When I followed that link I saw that GB was the first to reply to it - where is the old bugger? Are you still in contact with him on Facebook, Eldo? Seeing his avatar reminded me of the fact that I miss him

Yeah, I'm still friends with him on Facebook, though I've stopped commenting on his posts because they're almost all about conspiracy theories, pseudoscience, or really angry politics. Though he does post about about animals on a fairly regular basis too. I'm sure if you found him on FB he'd add you. His account is under the name "Gandalf's Beard".

I've brought up the forum with him a few times and he has had a few brief periods of activity since he dropped off the grid in mid-2011, but I think he just has other interests now. Though of course he's more than welcome to come back if he ever changes his mind (psst, GB, if you're reading this: come back!).

NB Petty I'm going to read the rest of the story, but I see you've posted three updates since I was on earlier this evening. Just how much writing did you do while waiting for Norc to catch up? But seriously, thanks for posting so much and so fast, and for finishing the story. I was really disappointed when it looked like you were going to abandon it due to the big argument back in the early pages of this thread.

Okay, so I finished the story and it's brilliant. I love it, Petty! I'm so glad you decided to return to the world of Forumshire fanfic and give us another gem of a story. Orwell's portrayal, Ally and CC's battle, the ending: it was all great.

This is brill, I'm sat giggling to myself like a loon. Thanks for sharing.

Eldorion wrote:

Norc wrote:regarding the rules. i think the top two are.. welll.... broken

I honestly don't.  There are tons of suggestive posts and some that toe the line of perhaps unacceptability, but no one has been posting pornography.  And most of the arguments on here are tongue in cheek, but when someone takes genuine offense to something we (meaning the mods; I can't speak for everyone else) do our best to take it seriously and resolve the issue so that everyone comes away happy.  If I thought I saw pornographic or abusive posts then I would do something to stop it, but people here do a good job of self-regulating within the norms of our community.

 well..............................(i did accidentally post furrie..stuff..)

OH MY FUCKING GOD! Etty AHOY!

Petty grabbed Eldo, putting one calloused tobacco stained hand either side of Eldo's head.

“Oh dear Eru he's going to headbutt me!” Eldo thought in panicking fear, but as Petty moved closer a worse thought occurred to him, “Oh dear Eru, he's not going to headbutt me.”

Petty's lips met Eldo's and the world swam.

Petty held on for dear life, lips locked to Eldo's in a loud sucking smack as Eldo went from pale red to bright red to purple and eventually an off shade of blue.

“He's going to kill him!” Norc squealed and charged at Petty, knocking him aside from Eldo who collapsed to the ground gasping for air

i just finished it all (i am not a slow reader i had to walk my dog who's got a loose stomach, again) and well... yeah. cool. erm...

I cant believe what a truly wonderful, funny, character catching story this has been !! Ive laughed, Ive "ooo'd", Ive wanted more. By the end I was choked ! Ive enjoyed this romp no end, Im also bloody sorry its ended ! Why not adapt OTHER "waggle-dagger" stories ? or just a sonnet ?......or 3 ? All the stories here are utterly brilliant, & this one ranks head & shoulders. Im over the moon you continued with it Petty ! Im over the moon I read it !   

"Raskere! Raskere!"

XD *dies laughing*

Ditto to Azzie. This has been such a treat!

I so love all the little bits. Me using dark planet magic to cheat at camping. And Azzie and me mothering the elves. You have a wonderful way with words.

And it's fun to see (simplified) Scothobbit accents by a real Scothobbit, if not to be reminded how impossible it is to understand.