Respectability

OHH its that time of the month, Haha, little "vagina joke" there

Don't say you weren't WARNED, Ally!

You know I think our standards may be slipping around here a bit.

I shouldn't be allowed to post after 1 am

leelee wrote:Ally you are so mysterious and in your face and hilarious and serious and this forum would not be the same without you.
Yes please King Eldo may I please not be called that anymore. It is rather , well , embarrassing.

I changed your title for you, Leelee. "Man of Dale" is just one of our default ranks based on post count, so everyone goes through it. If you like I can give you a customized title of your own: either one of your choosing or one of my own creation.

Pettytyrant101 wrote:You know I think our standards may be slipping around here a bit.

Well, i only show Hasia the gentler comments, her heart is so pure and gentle. Her uncle got hurt and said a mild swear word the other day and she cried for hours and felt ill. i think because Am is on this site she has the idea that all of you are just one jot lower than angelic. And in my heart you all are, so i intend to keep that thought in her dear sweet head. Please, we need an angelic avy.

Eldorion wrote:

leelee wrote:Ally you are so mysterious and in your face and hilarious and serious and this forum would not be the same without you.
Yes please King Eldo may I please not be called that anymore. It is rather , well , embarrassing.

I changed your title for you, Leelee. "Man of Dale" is just one of our default ranks based on post count, so everyone goes through it. If you like I can give you a customized title of your own: either one of your choosing or one of my own creation.

What you gave me is lovely and perfect. Thank you so much.

Shouldn't you have your Ambassador title though leelee? Woman of Dale is a bit non-specific for such an illumini as yourself.

You're very welcome, Leelee.

Pettytyrant101 wrote:Shouldn't you have your Ambassador title though leelee? Woman of Dale is a bit non-specific for such an illumini as yourself.

I am not an ambassador though dear Petty,i am only kin that comes by when she can. I am not here enough to ever be an ambassador, and Am to me, calm and collected, funny and not a scintilla of prudishness is the perfect ambassador and the only one needed. I am like the way it was with my little and dearest brother who died a while ago. We loved each other so much, but he rode his horse western, I rode English. He wore his cowboy gear and cowboy boots, i wore ballerina shoes and monochromatic clothing ; he loved a cold beer and drank shots like most people drink a milkshake, and he shared his beer with his huge Doberman pincer Omega, I drank milkshakes and lemonade and still do. So whenever I would go to see Nelson at a certain ranch all the hired hands and the lady of the house who was as gruff as they come would say "Nelson , the princess is here to see you. i tried so hard to fit in and they tried so hard to make everything lady like for me and it was pretty silly. sigh. i miss those days really. Iwent out on the range with for a cow run to take a herd some hundred miles away. I had the cowboy boots on, co ordinating jeans and top and actually enjoyed the crude cooking, we come from a large family of chefs, so like anything well made, but let's face it- I DID NOT FIT IN. Well only when anyone needed a friend to talk to.
And , let's be stricktly honest. I don't fit in here either. I come because there is something in each of you I love and so I, your Elven cousin come flitting in now and then and you try your best to be kind. Let Am who fits like a glove be the only ambassador.

How about something like 'Lady of Gentleness' then? (Get Elthir to translate it into Elvish it might sound better- but someting which reflects you more than just changing man of dale to lady of dale. Any suggestions from anyone?)

question. This thread, I tend to ignore it, but I do peek in once in a while. I'm curious. Am I respectable. I'de like to be. Or am I a bit too... well.. me?

Norc, have you ever heard Lily Rosemary and the Jack of hearts
Good song

yes.

Sister forgets key and knocks door - me talking in 3rd person- come in she said I'll give you shelter from the heat

It's my joke of the moment

Come in Norc I'll give you shelter from the respectable

I dunno what I answered.

You are NOT respectable, Norc. Know that this is Odo's Thread. He is the only respectable hobbit who ever comes here. Hope that helps.

I'm respectable in my own way.

Me 2

Looks like just the grownups left.

Come in she said and shelter from the porn

Odo: Jane, so nice of you to come this morning.... Tea?

Jane: Yes please.

Odo: One lump or two?

Jane: Oh I don't take sugar any more. It is the granule of Morgoth.

Odo: Really?

Jane: Yes.

Odo: I have no idea where this is going, you know.

Jane: Has that ever stopped you?

Odo: No, it hasn't. No, I don't think so...

Jane: I suspect you have some idea anyhow. It's to do with this Thread. The disrespectability shown toward it. That has to be it.

Odo: Oh yes! And Ally is the main culprit.

Jane: Isn't she always?

Odo: And Norc!

Jane: Probably... I read back through you know - the whole thread. I was left feeling confused mainly.

Odo: Yes, and we were around during the whole circumference of it --- and still I'm confused. I can only imagine what a newcomer here would think of it.

Jane: And Forumshire generally?

Odo: Indeed!

Jane: Anyow, shouldn't we start making a point of some sort?

Odo: About Ally and Norc?

Jane: Well, I guess they'll have to do.

Odo: Oh yes. And my point is --- do all young ladies have such disgusting minds nowadays? They're like sewers.

Jane: Yes - and I think you're showing your age and innate conservatism, Odo, which is only proper. Girls have changed, you know. It's not all jam donuts and popsickles behind the sheltersheds nowadays. We live in a more 'Whelshhaggis' time, to be honest.

Odo: Disgusting creatures, what - no matter how soft and moist to the touch

Jane: And semi-mythical too.

Odo: Which only makes them worse!

Jane: I know! Not that they are always soft and moist.

Odo: I've heard they are.

Jane: No, I've heard they can be positively 'dry' and 'bristling'.

Odo: You're thinking of the vulgar Scotshaggis genus, I'm afraid.

Jane: Oh --- yes....

Odo: Anyway, I don't think this is really essentially all about mythical four legged creatures from Whales, per se. It's about a certain 'filthiness state of mind' that girls have nowadays. Boys, of course, have always been filthy creatures...

Jane: Both mentally and physically... what with climbing trees and swimming in ditches...

Odo: And looking up dresses on stairways...

Jane: That too.

Odo: But 'girls' now seem to think of similar naughty things. And it's a shock! I only go by the things they say - and out loud - and without any apparent embarrassment!

Jane: You know girls are light-minded as a rule, and parrots. Maybe when they say disgusting things -- or mention horrid things like.. err... carrots... and.... err... cocktail frankfurts...and juicy plums... they think that's what they are actually saying... being too naive to know that the boys they hear that language from actually mean male and female genitalia by it...

Odo: This is becoming a very imprecise conversation, have you noticed?

Jane: I have. But for all that we must press on.

Odo: Must we?

Jane: I think so.

Odo: I'm really struggling to know what to say next.

Jane: This whole conversdation has been a bit like that... Are you going to pour out that tea?

Odo: Oh sorry.. No sugar, right?

Jane: None!

Odo: Tell me, Jane, do you really think girls repeat things they've heard but sometimes don't know the sexual import of some of what they're saying?

Jane: As to Ally and Norc? Well, I have no doubt. None! I mean, how could they? They seem such young and naive hobbit lasses.

Odo: Then - I guess them being younger lasses - we might best not take them seriously?

Jane: How wise of you, Odo. That is a very discerning remark. If only we could find some way to let them know just how vulgar they sound - in their innonence - but without alerting them that they ARE innoncent, thereby shattering their said INNOCENCE.

Odo: That actually makes sense when you really think about it, Jane.

Jane: But not the kind of sense that would please Ally or Norc, I'm afraid, if, indeed, they could comprehend it!

Odo: True. And best they don't, as they do have a propensity for girlish grumpiness.

Jane: What shall we do about them, though?

Odo: Ignore them, I think. Yes, that would be best. As we always try to do...

Jane: But what if they mention genitalia again?

Odo: Well, we must just pretend that they are really talking about donuts and popsickles. That way they'll be none the wiser, and we shan't know offense.

Jabe: Excellent. May I have a cookie or two with this cuppa?

Odo: They are full of sugar....

Jane: Oh dear... then I must refuse.

Odo: But no one need know, dear Jane...

Jade: Oh Odo - you are such a devil sometimes!

Odo: I know! ... .... Hey! Weren't we going to talk about disrespectability to this thread?

Jane: Never mind, Odo --- and pass the Cookie Jar...

Sorry was just passing Odo- dont mind me giggling through your window.
.

Jane: Oh dear! And me without my shawl!

Odo: There he goes... staggering through my petunias and gladiolii beds... What a ruffian! Never mind, Jane... It's only your bare arms he's seen....

Jane: That Scotshobbit makes me feel so.... exposed... whenever he looks at me. It's why I rarely go to Needlehole anymore. He's always turning up in the lanes. It's like he's stalking me.

Odo: A lot of the ladies in Forumshire feel that way.

Jane: Have they been saying that?

Odo: I just assume it.

Jane: And what an uncannily realistic seeming assumption it is!

Odo: As all strongly held assumptions are, of course.

Jane: And provided they are not made-up malicious assumptions to destroy a hobbit's reputation.

Odo: Dear, dear, Jane. Mr Tyrant is a Scotshobbit. His reputation is set in stone.

Jane: Oh dear. You make me laugh, Odo. Though 'set in buckie' might be a better expression.

Odo: Oh ho ho ho, Jane! Ho ho ho!

Jane: My goodness, you sound just like Father Eruvius now.

Odo: Sandy and Shady thought I was Father Eruvius until just before I sent them off to Ozhobbbitstan for betterring. ... Jane? You're shivering!

Jane: I'm thinking of Petty Tyrant again - peering in your window with those beady lascivious bloodshot eyes of his. He has no thought for the common curtesies. Why must he go peeping so?

Odo: Who knows why. But tell me - have you not heard of the Peeping Scot then?

Jane: I have -- but I thought it was just a Story to frighten young girls at bath time.

Odo: No, it's based on fact. Some say based on Mr Tyrant himself. I am curious, mind, to know why it's told to scare young girls at bath time.

Jane: Well, it ensures they wear their bathgown at all times while bathing. Just in case a male inadvertently walks in upon them.

Odo: I see. And we can't have that, can we?

Jane: Of course not.

Odo: So in a way it's good that Mr Tyrant has such a seedy reputation, in a way. If it makes girls wear their bathgown at all times - in the bath.

Jane: It's an ill wind that blows nobody no good, it's said; or something like that. Oh my goodness!

Odo: My! What ever is the problem now?

Jane: I was nibbling a cookie when he peeped in your window!

Odo: And?

Jane: Sugar! He must know there is sugar in cookies. I've been revealed!

Odo: I doubt he would have noticed. Those lasciviouis darting eyes of his would hardly have been looking at your face, Jane, though it may disturnb you to know it.

Jane: Oh my! I know you mean well, Odo, but I feel even worse now! And far worse begriméd!

Odo: That's what beady eyed Scotshobbits do to nice ladies and girls, Jane. A sad fact of life... Here. I'll make you another cup of tea,

Jane: Extra strong, Odo. extra strong!

Odo: I was about to anyway, for bringing you comfort is always high on my agenda.

Jane: You have always been a gentlehobbit of the highest order, Mr Odo Banks.

Odo: Oh tush, Jane! We know it is true, but you'll have me blushing next!

Norc wrote:question. This thread, I tend to ignore it, but I do peek in once in a while. I'm curious. Am I respectable. I'de like to be. Or am I a bit too... well.. me?

I have visited your blog and i think you are very pretty and witty and unbelievably talented. And respectable. Every bit as much as dear Odo.
Pretty, I would feel embarrassed, really. It is fine just as it is. But , honestly you are sweet, and thank you just the same.