Not so crabbit now!

The Edinburgh Fringe has just ended and every year a panel give an award for the best gag from the comedy shows that were on. Heres the top ten.


1. Stewart Francis - "You know who really gives kids a bad name? Posh and Becks."

2. Tim Vine - "Last night me and my girlfriend watched three DVDs back to back. Luckily I was the one facing the telly. "

3. Will Marsh - "I was raised as an only child, which really annoyed my sister."

4. Rob Beckett - "You know you're working class when your TV is bigger than your book case."

5. Chris Turner - "I'm good friends with 25 letters of the alphabet… I don't know why."

6. Tim Vine - "I took part in the sun tanning Olympics - I just got Bronze."

7. George Ryegold - "Pornography is often frowned upon, but that's only because I'm concentrating."

8. Stewart Francis - "I saw a documentary on how ships are kept together. Riveting!"

9. Lou Sanders - "I waited an hour for my starter so I complained: 'It's not rocket salad."

10. Nish Kumar - "My mum's so pessimistic, that if there was an Olympics for pessimism… she wouldn't fancy her chances."

Those are great!

I think the alphabet one is my favorite. *groans*

Got bronze

I'll confess to being clueless on the #1 joke. I've sorted out who Posh and Becks are, but still no chuckle. What am I missing?

Think its the name of their kids, can't remember what there called, but they have weird names.

Romeo
Cruise
Harper 7

George Ryegold - "Pornography is often frowned upon, but that's only because I'm concentrating."

Life resembles art -- at least where I come from!

Chris- "Think its the name of their kids, can't remember what there called, but they have weird names."

Ally- "Romeo Cruise Harper 7"

Thanks. I guess the joke just doesn't work over here. (I've met a couple people named Cruise and Harper, and Romeo is just boring compared to half the hippie names... )

I was pretty suprised by the no1- wouldnt have been my choice either.

I dont get the alphabet joke. At all. someone explain please.

Say it out loud.

doh!

http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/sideshow/missing-woman-unknowingly-joins-search-herself-165249353.html

‘Missing’ woman unknowingly joins search for herself
By Ron Recinto

A woman who was reported missing from an Icelandic tour unwittingly joined a search for herself.
According to the Reykjavik Grapevine, a woman described as "Asian, about 160cm, in dark clothing and speaks English well" was listed as missing Saturday near the Eldgjá volcanic canyon in southern Iceland.
A search continued through the weekend with reports saying she got off a tour bus and never returned.
It turns out the woman merely changed clothes during the bus stop, and after she returned, those on the bus didn't recognize her.
When the description of the "missing" woman was circulated, apparently the lady who changed her outfit didn't recognize the description of herself. So she joined the search party.
About 50 people searched the area in vehicles and on foot, and a helicopter was ready to assist.
Eventually it occurred to the "missing" woman that she could very well be the person everyone was looking for, and she promptly reported herself as safe and sound to police.
The search was called off early Sunday morning.

Uhhhhh...

This is why one stops, takes a breath, and considers the available facts before panicking and setting off down to the local police station to report the abduction and possible murder of a loved one - the same loved one who in the meantime has already returned home after deciding to walk down to the milkbar instead of driving - i.e. a half hour each way by foot, but five minutes by car.

It takes a full hour to stmble to the bar in my neighborhood & that doesnt account for breaks or falling in the ditch. Orwell

Would someone report you missing though?

most likely , takes all the fun out of it dont ya think,

halfwise wrote:http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/sideshow/missing-woman-unknowingly-joins-search-herself-165249353.html

‘Missing’ woman unknowingly joins search for herself
By Ron Recinto

A woman who was reported missing from an Icelandic tour unwittingly joined a search for herself.
According to the Reykjavik Grapevine, a woman described as "Asian, about 160cm, in dark clothing and speaks English well" was listed as missing Saturday near the Eldgjá volcanic canyon in southern Iceland.
A search continued through the weekend with reports saying she got off a tour bus and never returned.
It turns out the woman merely changed clothes during the bus stop, and after she returned, those on the bus didn't recognize her.
When the description of the "missing" woman was circulated, apparently the lady who changed her outfit didn't recognize the description of herself. So she joined the search party.
About 50 people searched the area in vehicles and on foot, and a helicopter was ready to assist.
Eventually it occurred to the "missing" woman that she could very well be the person everyone was looking for, and she promptly reported herself as safe and sound to police.
The search was called off early Sunday morning.

That is so embarrassing and so cool and so funny. I don't know whether to cry, laugh or turn dreadfully red.

As if Daves vegetables werent bad enough now this...

To both of the above

go dear god..